Reasons for a sudden change in a man's behavior?

Question

He is 29. We have known eachother for years and occasionly just flirt on the phone.(I like him, but I don't think he likes me - I am the one that keeps in touch). Anyway, the other weekend he asked me to come over and hook up. I said no, (cause I kind of care about him). I then texted him a few times days later and he ignored me. Finally, (just to see what he would do) I said I would come over and hook up. Again he didn't respond. A week later I was pissed because we had talked for so long and he was just ignoring me now. So I questioned why he stopped talking to me was it just because I wouldn't come over and have sex? He said he never said he wanted to have sesx (what? - he used to talk about sex all the time with me!) and knows we were just having fun and he doesn't really want to have sex and we can be friends. WTF is going on?

I think A) he met someone and is trying not to feel bad about treating me so horribly or B) he is trying to change the dynamic of the relationship (so its not just about sex) --> but if that was the case he would have asked me out or something...

Answer 1

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker

I think that it hurt his ego that you weren't at his beck and call...
Since you've always had the initiative, I am sure he expected that you'd jump to execute whatever comes out of his mouth.
If someone ignores you for this little, it is pretty clear he never really cared, and it's pretty clear you should forget about him. You've been too nice and you deserve better.

Asker's Rating:

Asker's Comment:

This was a hard answer to choose just because I don't want to hear it! haha. However, it was the most insightful and true. Thank you.

Answer 2

You're crazy if you think Im reading all that...

Answer 3

Or... C) You turned him down and had your chance. You missed it.

Answer 4

The answer is C) you are obsessing over a man that doesn't want to be with you. If he wanted to date you, he would have asked you on a date. He asked you to hook up one night and that should tell you where you stand. Move on.

Answer 5

I think he just wanted sex period and he's met someone that's giving him the booty.

Source(s):

Just my thoughts.

Answer 6

he has a life and he dont want you in it

Answer 7

i believe that when you denied him you hurt him and he's now trying to make you feel guilty or pissed by doing this. If he said he didnt want sex then he probably didnt. Just b/c you guys talked about it doesnt mean much.

Answer 8

men are not that deep. When you turned him down he got over it. I doubt men are even smart enough to play games.

Answer 9

I'd say A. I don't think he'd try and change the relationship by doing that.

Answer 10

ya i was in a similar situation. well this is not abt sex but this guy was lookin for a relationship and i kinda played like u too and he seemed to hav moved on.

Answer 11

I honestly think that he just sees you as a hookup and nothing more or else he would initiate a conversation. either that or he sees you just as friends and he felt denied when you said you wouldn't hook up with him so it hurt his ego. if he honestly cared about you (even as a friend) he would initiate a conversation with you. my best advice is to not text or call him and see if he tries to talk to you. if he doesnt i dont think you should waste your time waiting for him, honestly its not worth it.
hope this helps :)

Answer 12

Okay well I'm a guy and I'm 19 but I don't believe the psychology changes all that much.

To me, what's happened is... When you turned him down, he felt rejected like you were saying no to him.

He probably was thinking of sex but not like... OH I JUST WANNA F*** HER. He probably just had that as an after thought as most adults who like each other do lol.

But when you said no he probably felt like... Oh she doesn't really like me. So when he said he didn't want sex etc. He probably did but is saying that almost in a semi-revenge way lmao. Or... Almost as if he's a bit insulted that you'd think he was just like that so he's trying to difuse that image.

I have ADHD so I ramble like a mother but basically, he likes you, probably still does and probably felt rejected so is now being a bit stubborn.

To fix it, I think you should be 100% honest (if you do like him like THAT) and tell him you do and ask if he does. If you ask straight up like that, he'll more than likely be totally honest too.