My friends likes me...but I don't like him!? Help!?

Question

Hey! :)
Ok, my friend has a crush on me and he's constantly flirting with me. He's previously really really liked a good friend of mine (for a long time, too), and I'm just not comfortable with that fact. Also, I'm not sure if I would be attracted to him even if he had never liked my friend.
He's really nice and I don't want to lose him as a friend...How do I make him see that his behavior is a little out of line, and how do I tell him that I don't like him? I don't want to be mean or break his heart or anything...


Thanks!! :D

Additional Details

He's told both a mutual friend and me that he likes me. =/

Answer 1

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker

Flirting with someone is a sign that the person likes you but is never a sure sign that they like you as more than a friend or want to date you. So make sure that he truly likes you as more than a friend first before doing anything. Once you are confident that he likes you romantically , then all you do is tell him how you feel.It is as simple as that. No body can force you to love them or make you return the feelings they have for you. Since it seems that you have a good rapport with this guy,pick a time when you guys can talk with some privacy and say something like " I know that you have a crush on me and I am flattered by it;however,I do not feel the same way about you.I do want to remain your friend though.I hope I have not hurt your feelings since that is not my intention.I hope we can still remain friends even if we can not date( or use any words that you are comfortable with saying)".His answer will not only help you decide your next move but also will tell you how he feels. I suggest that you make sure that he has a crush on you before you say anything or that might end your relationship faster than the idea of him liking you.

Asker's Rating:

Asker's Comment:

very detailed, thanks

Answer 2

Breaking his heart is unavoidable. The best you can do is explain to him you're not attracted to him but you really don't want to lose him as a friend, and hope he is able to live with that and control his emotions. It'll be rough for him if you get a boyfriend, or anything like that - so try to be understanding if just being friends is too difficult for him.

Answer 3

You need to be honest with him and tell him how you feel about the situation. It is going to be a lot easier for him to hear it now than two months down the road when he is really attracted to you.

Just explain that you love spending time with him and you don't want that to change but it isn't going to go any farther than you being friends. If it gets really uncomfortable you are going to have to explain that you can be friends and hang out and have a good time but if he can't respect that than it isn't going to work out for you two.

Answer 4

tell him how you feel