Are we really just friends?

Question

Me and this guy have a kinda weird relationship, we're friends, well, not really. Last year I told him I liked me, and we had a thing going for about a week (we were never official) and he told me he didn't want a relationship...then he had a girlfriend the next week. ******* right? Anyways, so for the remainder of last year we didn't really talk since I was really hurt by the whole thing, even though through this whole time he thought we were cool.
So, this year, me and him have a class together, and ultimately I think I'm around him more than I'm around any one other person throughout the schoolday. So, he's a major flirt, but he messes with me A LOT, and I really thought nothing of it, that that was just how he was. But last week he texted me, (he was a tad drunk at the time) and said he wanted me to join him so "we could have some fun." I almost went for it too, but at the same time, I didn't want that to be that girl that he calls in the middle of the night, so I refused. Now I'm just really confused. Is he actually attracted to me? Or does he just see me as an easy target? What do you think?

Sorry that was so long!

Answer 1

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker

I'd say it's all of the above. He likes you, he knows he hurt you, and he'd like some way to get back into your good graces. The good news is that when he's drunk and lonely, his thoughts are of you. That's also the bad news.

Propane Cylinder has a lot of good points. Although I don't agree with the absolutism of a few spots, he's got the basic concepts.

I would say it's time to confront this guy and clear the air. Let him know that you're still hurt about last year, and give him a chance to tell you how he feels. A year is a long time. I know I'd like a chance to see a couple of classmates and apologize for certain slights -- nothing like you went through, but I didn't have the maturity then to simply apologize out of the blue one day.

If he's really a jerk, you'll have cleared the air on that. If he's someone who made a couple of mistakes and would *like* a little room to do things right (it took me a lot of practice to grow up), you could have a decent friendship -- and maybe more, if he changes a couple of basic assumptions he's made.

If any of this sounds good to you, feel free to use it. Throw out anything that doesn't feel right to you. Your instincts seem be working pretty well so far at keeping you out of trouble.

Asker's Rating:

Asker's Comment:

Thank you. I appreciate everyone's answers. I'll talk to him monday morning when I see him. Well, I'll try to at least.

Answer 2

Well, since you told him a year ago that you like him. So he is just messing with you

Answer 3

well to me it seems that you should ask him what is up, i try to be open some times it works and others i end up in a lot of trouble but it makes me fell good because i know what is going on. hope this helps any questions regarding my answer don't be shy just ask.

Answer 4

Hi Fan Girl,

What do I think? Well, you certainly made the correct decision to stay home.

So, a drunk calls you for some action. It doesn't matter if he's attracted to you or not... he doesn't respect you, your heart, your soul, your values, your feelings... or your family.

You are 100% correct - he sees you as an easy target (to satisy his own selfish desires... and then he'll dump you).

Just friends? That's a stretch. Would a friend call and suggest playing with fire and possibly getting a nice young lady pregnant?

Want some free advice? OK.

- You seem to have the wisdom to recognize a loser, and are smart enough to not fall for his crap. Don't lose that wisdom.

- Don't believe anything a guy says unless his words are backed up by his actions... over a period of months.

- Keep your panties on until you get married. That'll eliminate 99% of the creeps, losers, and players... which will make your life much happier and simpler in the long run.

- Don't make too many stupid decisions, don't drink booze or take drugs, don't have friends or partners who drink or take drugs, listen to your Mom and Dad, and then everything will work out fine.

That's all there is too it, Fan Girl.

Good luck and best wishes! I'm proud of you.

Signed, PC

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Source(s):

Cylindrical Logic