Beautiful friend dating....insecure arrogant loser?

Question

My friend is so smart, she is well educated, super gorgeous and is the most kind, modest, caring warm hearted friend I could have, she is utterly selfless and just so giving polite and respectful. A guy has been dating her for a week now and already he's a jerk. he is not so intelligent, very unnatractive, arrogant, very insecure with low self esteem. They hav been out on three dates and already he is trying to control her, telling her how much make up to wear, what clothes to wear, what she should eat at restaurants. He also constantly says things to get a rise out of her. What is funny is that she is so smart and exhudes an inner strength that he is too stupid to see so she can see right through him and turns it back on him and he can't handle it. How can she end it with him, bearing in mind that he (attempts) to be manipulative and controlling. He is such a weak worthless loser. She deserves much better he is just intimidated by her brains and her beauty and I think he is jealous of her.

Answer 1

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker

It seems that you are the one with the problem as opposed to your friend.If your friend is everything you say she is---smart,well educated,exudes an inner strength and he is jerk,not so intelligent and respectful,unattractive,arrogant,insecur… low esteem,,weak,worthless loser,---then it is clear and apparent that she can handle him handily. Plus you do not give her any credit for good sense in her choice of a partner.There is no partner or mate or boyfriend who is 100% perfect.(this applies to women as well) with no negatives,It just becomes a numbers game ---how many good points versus bad points.Your friend apparently sees things in him that you do not sees because you have closed your eyes to the possibility.You have decided to not like him and his shortcomings have made it very easy for you to do so.But your friend sees something in him that she finds attractive which Hopefully would help him become a better human being and person.

Asker's Rating:

Asker's Comment:

I can see your perspective, however it is deeply flawed. She has been consulting me the past few days because this guy has revealed his true colours very quickly. She is just not sure how he will handle it.

Answer 2

She can end it the way she could end it with anyone...say "I appreicate your interest but we're just not a good match...good luck in the future" and let that be that. It's pretty simple actually.

Answer 3

Yea you're totally talking about yourself. And it takes one to know one. You're just as arrogant as he is lmao. Just start ignoring his texts and calls. Play the super busy line.

Answer 4

You have to trust that your friend knows what she is doing.

You have no right to interfere.

Sorry.

Answer 5

Some girls like that controlling behavior for some sick reason it makes them feel wanted. If she didn't like it she would cut off ties with him because it still is early on in the relationship.

Answer 6

Sad, sad, sad. Too many women in this world have beautiful qualities and settle for jerks. I was one of those types of women, but you know what, a woman no mater how talented has to learn to respect hereself and know what she deserves and expect that out of a man. Talk to your friend, but she is the one who makes the decision to stay with him. So while you are steeming, just pray for her, but she is a free moral agent and if she decides to date a jerk, well just hope that she is happy with it.

Answer 7

Well, she can end it by calling him and saying it's over. He's not going to accept that decision lightly, so she should prepare for drama -- phone calls, visits, general idiocy. But she should tell him it's over and never, ever contact him again. It's called the cut direct and it's the only thing that works.

Your friend might not have the fortitude to do that though. Who knows why she is attracted to his loser? Maybe she likes the idea of "saving" someone. Maybe she is secretly insecure. A lot of smart, gorgeous, caring, kind women date losers, and it's tough to say why. She might not see this guy's controlling behaviour as clearly as you, an outsider, see it.

Pointing out his flaws to her might drive her closer to him. Just be there for her when it's over. It's all that you can do, unfortunately.

Answer 8

gosh just let her be.