SURVEY: For all you Older people out there...?

Question

How would you women feel about your partner not caring about his appearance, i mean not even trying to dress nice, go to the mall with you with tatty cut - out pants made into shorts, abit dirty, a shirt with a couple of holes and stained, (He says its clean,its been washed) but you can see its not looking nice. And he is bare foot aswell., he is always like this no matter what amount of clothes you buy him. I buy him a new shirt and new pants and not long and he has worked on some dirty job at home wearing them and ruined them with grease etc. Happens again and again, how would you feel about that? I feel ashamed to be seen with him like that in public as he looks like a homeless person . Does it mean i do not love him enough because it affects me?? Would you love some one no matter how yucky they dress because they just do not care or would it make you love them less and feel ashamed?? I want my man to dress nice and care about his appearance but he does not. Guys, are any of you out there like this?? Why is he like this? please no silly answers, i am serious. person

Additional Details

He is my ex - husband and he has been wanting to get back together, but it really puts me off with the way he doesnt care about looking half decent. (Always was like this and has not changed) I did try when i was with him, hopelessly.

Answer 1

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker

There are women out there who love that rustic, i dont even know what to call it, look. personally thats not for me as well and no it doesn't mean you dont love him enough..it just means youre not compatible with him in that aspect. If i fell in love with someone and truly loved them, even a change in appearance like this couldnt wither my love..but it would definitely bother me and i would say something about it. if he loved you, he would try to compromise and meet you halfway. i dont disagree with you wanting him to dress nicely because its very attractive when a guy is clean-cut, well maintained, and professional. there's something about looking raggedy and dirty that makes him look extremely lazy and careless.

but my question is was he like this when you first met him? If he was then you cannot change much because you should have expected it from the start..as for my boyfriend of 2 years, when we first met he was a total neat freak. Then he developed some laziness the more he worked, and it took me about a year to get it through his head that i missed the way he used to be and that his untidiness drives me insane. He finally processed it but i didnt force it onto him..and now he's slowly changing back to the way he used to be.

ask your man if that is the way he likes to be, and if he will not budge and makes that very clear to you, then either accept it or move on because if he doesnt want to change he will not.

Asker's Rating:

Asker's Comment:

yes, he has always been like this and not changed...thanx.

Answer 2

Who does his laundry? Specifically I mean who hangs up his torn and stained shirts and puts them in his clothes closet? If that person is you, why are you doing that?

Answer 3

Tell him that.

you two are married and alot of people in relationships start to get lazy and very comfortable(unless es been like this for ever).BUY him new clothes sit him down and say "i love you but you embarrass me" nothing wrong with that.

Yes i do know guys like that and the problem is no one ever tells them that sometimes thats not appropriate for leaving the house.

Answer 4

As people grow older, they are much wiser as knowing that younger generation with eventually felt that they are a burden to them. So they become smarter as little word meaning fewer problems.
They will not reject your kindness and they will never voices their objection.
Some seniors will talk to you telling you of their spinning lies, their objective is to lure you to be better and bringing them good stuffs and services.
As we will be in their stage in time to come, be prepare for yourself and usher in with full knowledge.
All we needed is time to spare talking and hearing their old time stories repetitions without feeling drag.
If you have a passion and able to sit down listen to their stories, I am sure you can develop patience, kindness and caring to the senior of the nation.