Does he still love me?

Question

Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 8 months. We just recently moved in together and things are going good with living togethe. It is just that he doesn't compliment me anymore like never when he always used to. He used to tell me I love you out of the blue now he doesn't… he only sometimes says it when I say it too him. And I asked him why and he said I say it to much… which is like twice a day… He consrtantly checks out other girls in front of me… Like I don’t mind that just don’t do it all the time... He just doesn’t seem happy anymore. When he picks me up from work I am so happy to see him but it’s like he is grumpy or mad when he sees me like the way he says Hello. It’s like hes not one bit excited to see me. He never just puts his arm around me, try to hold my hand or even give me a kiss. It is always me having to do those things. And when I asked him how you like living together so far he just said its good you cook for me. And I was like no whatelse and that’s all he could think of. He never tells me how he really feels. I just don’t feel like he really loves me. My friends and family reassure me he does because we moved in mutually and he bought me a car for my birthday. I mean he is still nice to me and we have our fun moments Its just that he never shows that he loves me to me. I have mentioned this to him several times and nothing has changed… I cut him some slack because its his first serious relationship. I don’t know.. what are your thoughts.. please say anything, anything

Additional Details

thanks everyone that is really reassuring... and to the last comment the really long one.. i thought that is what is was like being together all the time but when i try to hang out with my mom... ps i moved from calgary almost a year ago and only made a couple friends that i barely hang out with so i hang out with my mom he gets upset and say oh i thought we were goin to do this or if if i try to go to calgary for a weekend he gets upset and say your just goin to be partying... i feel like we do need our space but he never takes it.. i tell him to go hang out with his friends but he doesnt want to..

Answer 1

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker

Okay, please listen to what I am going to say!

This relationship is not ruined, it can still be salvaged ( most likely, because given if he wanted to move in with you then he definately had some love for you).

You are being clingy! Don't make your boyfriend your whole world! I know it's easy to get into a relationship and want to be with your guy 24/7 and have amazing times together and everything ( I know I do, it's hard to not want to). BUT you need to make time for YOU time. Go out with friends, have girl's night, pick up a new hobby, join a local sports team at your park. whatever, just something that makes YOU happy that doesn't involve him. Here's the thing with guys- they are attracted to a girl that loves them and loves being with them, but doesn't have to be. If you make it known that he is just the best thing in your life and all you think about then you are killing your relationship.

And don't nag him anymore! Nagging gets you nowhere (as you have seen!). If you feel like you are starting to be underappreciated, then politely tell him you are going on a mini R&R weekend trip with some girlfriends for the weekend (tell him on Thursday, leave Friday) and say have a good weekend baby, i'll be back on Sunday! Don't call him every hour when you're there, and don't incessantly check your phone. Just HAVE FUN. Call him once "( or text him) to tell him you made it there safely( in a polite, nice way). Even go visit a friend that lives an hour away for a weekend, go out with her on the town HAVE FUN.

When you and his lives don't completely revolve around eachother, it makes for a much healthier, happier relationship. Let him have boy's nights, you have girl's nights! Keep your good girlfriends! They will outlast any man.

Oh, and about him checking out girls, don't even acknowledge it. If he does it, pretend you don't see it. If he gets a response from you, he'll keep doing it because he can see he has a hold on you. If he doesn't get any response and you act like you don't notice, it is more intriguing and it makes you seem like a confident, sexy women. Other women don't intimidate you! You're beautiful. Guys are guys they will look, and they are like toddlers because if you respond they will do it again and again to get on your nerves.

Good luck! I know it's hard, but try! Best wishes to you

Source(s):

Life, a few long term relationships, getting my heartbroken. Don't learn the hard way!

Asker's Rating:

Asker's Comment:

excellent in detail. thanks

Answer 2

he loves u he is just use to you being around all the time ..so he know love is in the atmosphere other wise u wouldnt be with him .
dont worry about him looking at other girls ..he still come home to you ..
if you want a compliment ..

just say baby do you like this ...and u got it........

in a relationship it cant be about u all the time its 50 50
just be thankfull for the simple things like sharing a bed ..and cudling on the couch ...

Source(s):

my heart

Answer 3

awwwnn!!! u should talk to him about it..talking is the best solution..it will make things clear and if he gets mad at you, u should ask him why hes mad at u..and ask him if he loves u or not..tell him how much u love him and get excited to see him :)

Answer 4

Maybe the "newness period of relationship" has wore out a bit. When you move in with someone you see each others good parts and their faults. The real them. Now that's not necessarily a bad thing. Maybe just takes more adjustment time. I think you should do your best to share how you feel about things too. He may not realize how you feel about the situation. Good luck. I think he does still love you.

Answer 5

well.. maybe it is his personality... check that?? some people just don't like to show their feelings.... or maybe you guys need a break... sometimes being with the same person ALL the time get kind of boring... maybe he do love tho

Answer 6

It could be that he does really love you and he doesn't know how to show it or express it. It is probably just part of his personality if so then you better get used to it because you wont be able to change him. OR it can be that he loves you but is probably going through something that has affected him emotionally and he has not shared what is bothering him with you and his mood as a result is a little on the depressed side and you automatically think it has something to do with you.

Answer 7

im going through the same thing as you... i've found that when something's bothering you, mention it to him once and allow him to change it, if he doesnt then do the same thing to him.. it helps a lil
like eg if he doesnt hug u, then tell him u love it wen he holds u and that u want him to fo it more often... if he doesnt change it then dont hug him.. he'll eventually ask whats wrong or he'll rmemeber what u said
pls help me out with my Q
thanks... hope this helps babe :)

Answer 8

I think you need to work with him and not add pressure through your needs that translate into demands. He's not ready for all you want yet his intentions are obviously sincere. He's probably doing all he can.

Sometimes we need to be shocked into realities. You run the risk of killing this very new and young relationship because he's not doing as you WANT. On the other hand, once you separate want from need, you may find that what you two have already is quite a lot.

I disagree that the decision to live together or buying you a car means all is well for it's not. He's more closed up than you and probably hasn't a clue. Try this:

When he and you meet at home after a day of working apart from one another, look at him with an inviting smile and tell him you picked up a little token gift. Let his curiosity take over and when he asks "For whom?"---tell him it's for him. Make it a simple gift of a favorite candy or something equally frivolous. Make him beg, "Well, where is it?" Put your arms around him, pull his head close and tell him it's going to take a kiss to get on the receiving line. When he kisses you, look at him with intensity as though you're eyes are going to teach him something and say: "I love you---that's what the gift is about---it's saying "I love you. I don't know how much that may mean to you but to a woman, it means EVERYTHING."

Teach your man how to show his love for you to you and he'll never want more anywhere.

Answer 9

this situation sounds alot like my friends. and me being the third party, hopefully this advice can help you. But I can only compare.

I know its increasingly harder to figure out whats going on when your man is with holding information from you that will help you to grow, Something has to be bothering him in some way if hes
1.checking out other ladies -hes got you, why does he need other women for eye candy.. Unless your ugly?
2.he only SOMETIMES says i love you when you say it to him? and twice a day is not alot.

3.cooking for each other is a perc, but in my mind, its just another activity to do together, it shouldnt be something thats taken advantage of. But thats just me.

i dont know, perhaps hes expecting more out of the relationship. But what else can you give him that you already arnt? In my opinion, if someone loves you, there shouldnt be any question of weather they do or not. IF you do, then its not really love (but aint it exciting to know that what your feeling could possibly be something similar to but not quite love?)

For my friend, he says hat his relationship is like a bank, he invests, but his gf is always taking money out. IF someone is taking more then whats going in, well that just doesnt work doesnt it? Eventually things become tight and the person whos putting all that in and not reaping any of the rewards grows impatient and just looses interest in putting effort into making the relationship flourish.

above all, if he isnt talking, you need to make him talk. He if he refuses, then let him know that somethings wrong, or you think it is , and you need to discuss it, cant keep everything in the closet, its gotta come out sooner or later,, (except homosexuals, they can just stay in there)