How to cure/discipline a frequently crying baby?
I have a 11 month old daughter. Lately, her favourite hobby has become crying. If anything is not to her liking, her first response is to start crying and continue crying till she is either given what she wants or is picked up and hugged and comforted. She has also become very demanding on her mother's time. If her mother leaves her alone even for a few seconds, she starts crying. If we try to make her do anything that we want, she starts crying. Another problem is that, if she cries loudly for even 30 seconds, there is a very high possibility that she will vomit out whatever she has eaten in the previous hour or so. That also has us on tenterhooks all the time. If we go out, making her sit on the carseat is another major worry. We can't do anything when we want to and the way we want to. We get no time to ourselves. Seems like she is totally dictating our day to day life. Everything has to be done according to her whims and fancies. Any guidance/suggestions would be much appreciated.
- Anonymous1 decade agoBest Answer
Jeez, they are little devils aren't they? My friend's son used to hold his breath and pass out at that age if he didn't get what he wanted! He also used to vomit! You simply have to try and ignore the bad behaviour and reward the good behaviour. Clean up the vomit without making a fuss (train everyone else to ignore her and not say anything or rush to help her) - just one of you has to ignore her, clean and change her and keep talking to someone else. She's gotten herself into a behaviour she doesn't know how to get out of. I know it's very hard - are there parenting courses near where you live? I live in Western Australia, and there's a great place called NGALA which has phone assistance, you can go in and stay for a day and get help or stay even a week with your family. They have parenting courses on sleep, behaviours, feeding etc. I took my daughter there for a day when I had great trouble in getting her to sleep. Check out their website below for some tips and see if there's something similar where you live. Good luck - and they DO grow out of it!!Source(s): www.ngala.com.au
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Yikes! There are a lot of people with insensitive suggestions. Well-meaning, but mean!
Have you ever tried carrying baby in a sling? I use a Maya Wrap, and I love it, but you can make a wrap sling out of an ordinary piece of cloth. Even at this age, babies benefit from the closeness of babywearing. They love having an adult point of view, and they learn to talk much sooner (my second knew several words at 8 months). Having all those words helps with the tantrums, and being carried close to mom and dad is also helpful. I bet that if you start wearing baby an hour or two a day, her behavior will improve. Even better, take her for long walks, the extra exercise will give you more patience for dealing with tantrums. I didn't wear my first baby enough, and I'm still dealing with tantrums.
Dr Sears talks about biggies and smallies. Sitting in the carseat is a biggie. Baby can cry and cry, but the carseat is non-negotiable. Lay blankets all over the backseat of the car to catch the vomit and bring a change of clothes. Clothing decisions, for example, is a smallie. If you sense that baby is about to throw a tantrum over having to wear the green shirt, just dig her favorite shirt out of the dirty laundry and let her wear it (for the third time this week). I hope this helps.Source(s): www.mayawrap.com www.mamatoto.org www.askdrsears.com
- 1 decade ago
Wow ~ There are really some harsh sounding responses to your question! Your child is completely normal. At 11 months old she still cannot communicate her needs to you without crying. And you going to her to comfort her is the BEST thing you can do, not the worst. At this age as well is usually when seperation anxiety kicks into high gear. Have you recently had any changes in your life, gone back to work, or changed her routine?
If your little ones crying seems to be happening for no reason you could still go to her, but try to distract her, or do something besides just cuddling and see if that works. Sit beside her on the floor and play with some toys with her, or sit her in your lap and read her a book. Put her in her stroller and take her for a walk. I know sometimes it feels like life is not your own anymore, but this is likely a phase that will pass. Just try to be extra patient with her. Parenthood definitely has its ups and downs doesn't it!Source(s): ~Registered Nurse ~Mom of 3 and 36 weeks pregnant with # 4
- starryeyedLv 61 decade ago
You created a monster! Check out the basics of behavior modifictaion!
It will take you about half as long as the time it took you to reward the child.
There is no punishment for an 11-month old, but there IS such a thing as REFUSING TO GIVE IN.
That's a very different story.
You need a good bit of reading or help to change your outlook.
If you pick her up and give her what she wants, she will ALWAYS cry. As a teenager, as a wife, as an employee, etc. It may turn to whining instead, or anger if that doesn't work, but it will continue life-long if you don't set LIMITS and do it NOW.
\PS both I and now my son just know better, b/c our mothers knew better. I had to do this with my ex's little cousin, who was my charge while my son and I lived in the family home. My son was an angel, almost, and this little boy of ten was retarded to a mild degree, so people had spoiled him. At first, I was told not to bring this child back to the library, he was such a spoiled thing. After six months, I took the boys back to the library, and the very same librarian was amazed that this well-behaved, quiet boy was the same child!
It's tough, but it CAN be done, and in the end,
being what you might call mean actually empowers children to be respectable little people who are well liked and given more opportunity in life.
That's the best thing we can do!
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- ladybugLv 41 decade ago
This is normal. She may be going through the whole "stanger anxiety" thing. My daughter went through that around the same age. She would flip even when I'd leave the room while she was playing with Daddy.
Also, young children and babies don't automatically know how to cheer themselves up. It's learned. The more you make her giddy, the more you make her laugh, the better ability she will have to get herself out of a funky mood.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
You know I am a bit concerned about the throwing up that comes along with it, babies don't generally just cry for no reason. She may be having a digestive problem, you may need to take her to the pediatrician and have a talk with him about this. Good Luck
- Anonymous1 decade ago
First of all, you do not "discipline" an 11 month old. At this stage in that child's development it is not uncommon for a child to want for thier mother's attention. My son wouldn't even go to his father for a good three months betwen the age of 9-12 months.
Try rewarding the good behavior. I know people get tired of this kind of talk, but at her age especially it is VERY effective. Before her mother leaves the room tell her, "mommy has to go do a chore, she will be gone for 5 minutes, if you can play quietly for 5 minutes, mommy is going to bring you a "blank". Make sure when she does succeed with this, you make a huge production out of congratulating her.
It sort of sounds to me like one bad habit is feeding another. Clearly I dont know the entire situation, but it seems like her negative behavior is feeding off of your negative reactions, as your negative reactions are feeding off her negative behaviors.
My favorite comment of your "We can't do anything when we want to and the way we want to. We get no time to ourselves. Seems like she is totally dictating our day to day life." This is a simple fact. I'm sure you heard this long before you had children. It wasn't a joke, it's a fact, your children do dictate your life. But as parents it's our job to learn to control the situation, and adjust our lives accordingly.
- 1 decade ago
The reason why she cries all the time is because u guys created the impression that crying get her whatever she wants. Try this..when u r @ home..when she cries TOTALLY ignore her just continue chatting, cooking, watching tv..just do whatever u were doing and pretend she doesn't exist. When she stops crying, carry her, hug her, pamper her, make her happy. If possible do what she wanted u 2 do. Over time she'll realise that crying does not work. If u need further help holla.Source(s): Experiences!
- Kat HLv 61 decade ago
It sounds like she has developed some bad habits. Her parents have to decide on a set of rules they will stick to. When it's time to get dressed/eat/ get in the car, It has to be done. Regardless of screaming/throwing up. Once she learns that she has to do what she's told anyway, she will start to behave. Get a handle on this now, before she gets any older. It will only get worse.Source(s): mom of a 2 1/2 year old
- wwpetcemeteryLv 51 decade ago
Well she's got you trained. To get the crying to stop is to let her cry her heart out when she doesn't get her way. It's a pain for you but there has to be a line drawn as to who is in charge.