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Rowill asked in Beauty & StyleHair · 1 decade ago

I want to die my hair and get it relaxed. Which should I do first to caust the least damage to my hair?

I have natural, african-american hair that is prone to breakage. I know relaxing is tough on hair so i was thinking i should do that last. Is that the right order, I've never dyed or relaxed my hair before so I want to do it right.

15 Answers

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Honey NO!!!!

    --If your hair is prone to breakage you don't throw chemicals in it! That just makes it worse.

    A little FYI:

    Follow the time alloted for your hair type. If it says 12 minutes you should be washing it out by 12min 1 sec.

    Also you need to make sure that you wash the relaxer

    completely out of your hair. This is important. There is a chemical process going on here. The only thing that STOPS this process is a Neutralizer, usually colorcoded (which comes with the pack).

    Relaxers 'weaken' black hair when forcing it straight. Freshly relaxed hair is at it's weakest point. So when you relax you must IMMEDIATELY condition. I wash with shampoo and a conditioner. Do hot oil and then apply a deep conditioner or hair mask and sit under the dryer for 15-30 min.

    --Your hair is prone to breakage because you simply don't know how to take of it.

    Black hair breaks-- because of our curl pattern. The pattern creates tension points. The strand breaks at these points...

    'Black hair' breaks BECAUSE it is dry so you must replenish the oils with moisturizers.

    My mother relaxed my hair because it was too big and bushy to deal with. Think Rudy from the Cosby Show...but longer. It still is. But I have long thick hair. I have to keep it relaxed because I can't deal with this beast in it's 'natural state'. I don't know how. So....I can talk all day long about proper black hair care. I could be a hair model!

    --You should realize that relaxers are NOT a quick fix. Relaxed hair requires more upkeep.

    This means using quality products. Stay away from 'box perms' until you know what you're doing. The best line you can buy in the stores is Motions, Protect V, and a few others off the top of my head but a word to the wise: Stay away from the cheap ****, please!

    BTW, I used Optimum and I was NOT impressed. It's an expensive but inferior product compared to less marketed brands. Lord knows why Kelly Rowland supposedly relaxed her virgin strands with it.

    MIZANI is a quality relaxer. Also KERA-CARE...and a few other I can't think of--but they are expensive and they come in 'pieces'. You will have to go to a beautician. It is best to go to one because these relaxers are not home-care friendly.

    You're a novice you could not be expected to be mixing and measuring for proper consistency. and comparing to charts to ensure PH and all that crap... It is somewhat complicated.

    Keep the heat out of you hair. Dry hair and heat don't go well together. Instead learn how to wrap your hair to maintain your style.

    Don't forget to trim.

    Condition, Condition, hair needs strength.

    Buy a hairdryer. Goody sells dryers for $30-40. Try hot oil treatments. I like to apply a hot oil then deep condition under the dryer. The idea is that the conditioner will better penetrate.

    See hair is like skin when you apply heat the pores just pop open. The hair responds better in my opinion.

    Moisturize, moisturize, hair is always thirsty. I use a light mositurizer--not into heavy grease. I like hair that MOVES.

    Lastly if you want your hair to grow...just wash it and leave it alone. Notice the way hair grows while in braids and sew-ins? There in no magic ingredient in weave that makes stimulates hair growth.

    On that subject, there is no such thing as a product that magically GROWS hair.

    It is all about maintenance.

    --If you do contact a beautician make sure that they specialize in ETHNIC HAIR CARE, please. Some are better at updos. Some are better at 'short cuts'. Some specialize in proper black hair care maintenance. Some of them don't know what the hell they're doing.

    Trust me...all aren't proficient in everything. And don't assume that they know what they're doing just because they happen to be black or dominican. Check out their work if they have pics. Or if you encounter a woman with a nice precision cut or a healthy head of hair ask where she goes to get her hair done.

    Anyway you're dealing with conflicting chemicals, here (perms and dyes).

    I relaxed and dyed my hair with a day or two or each other and and it wasn't a biggie but my hair could take the hit. It's strong...and healthy. But there is great potential for disaster. Bottom line do not use chemicals in your hair if you don't know what you're doing.

    Do not use chemicals if your hair is breaking and damaged.

    I tell you what I tell you because I can't stand to see a sista walking around with her head looking a damn mess.

    I feel as though you'll be bald-headed before it's all over with.

    Let's work at avoiding that....

    Source(s): I'm a hair maven.
  • 1 decade ago

    if you have never had a relaxer I would go to a shop and get it done. If not try Optimum go with the regular not super no matter the texture of your hair you don't want to fry it.

    if you can't find Optimum go with Soft and Beautiful...both of these packages have an added bonus something like a hot oil treatment only it is for "our" hair.

    Follow the directions on the box...don't think you can only wash you hair once..wash it a couple of times if the suds are still pink keep washing or it is going to break off...and make sure you use the shampoo included in the kit--everything else is going to burn like HECK.

    Dyeing your hair. The base rule is 2 weeks later...2 weeks to get it braided (extentions) 2 weeks to get it dyed!

    Good luck...Oh and those gloves don't really work so well..if you don't use them be prepared to have your nails jacked up. Wear clothes you don't care about and take off all jewelry.

    Follow up with a good grease or KEMI oil

  • 1 decade ago

    Honestly, you're not really supposed to do a double process like that because even if you only dye it or relax it your hair will become damaged no matter what. Then doing another chemical process is going to make it worse. It can become really dry and really brittle and then it could break off. I speak from experience.

    Of course people do it anyway though. If you still want to I would suggest going to a skilled professional and getting a consultation to see if your hair is in good enough shape for either process. If it is then proceed with either one. Say you get it relaxed first, and then you want to color it, you're going to have to wait about 4-6 weeks before getting it colored after your relaxer. If I were you I'd wait even longer just to see how your hair has reacted to the relaxer and the excess heat you'll probably using to style it. If it's not breaking off and seems relatively healthy then I'd go for the color.

    If you do both processes be aware that in order to keep your hair in good shape you're going to have to be willing to do the maintainence on it. Regular trims, regular touch ups to your roots to both relax and color, and you're going to have to keep it moisturized.

    If I were you I'd just keep my hair natural and color it. Then you'd have the option to wear it curly or wear it straight without causing serious damage. I found a site that has the best products for kinky hair. Go to

    even though I relax my hair it still gets really difficult to straighten those roots so I use the detangler which makes my hair soft and shiny, they also make a cream for loosening your curl to wear your hair natural, or to loosen it so you can straighten it. Also check out it's a site for girls with natural hair, it's not preachy and she gives great advice for taking care of your hair naturally.

    **** By the way I read the advice someone gave about using a children's relaxer, it's a bunch of bull. A child's relaxer has the same kind and amount of chemicals as regular ones, it's no difference they just market it so that parents will feel like it's more gentle. The best drugstore relaxer I have used that doesn't burn is Dr. Miracle's, but it still has chemicals too it just has more conditioners so it's a little more gentle. But for your first relaxer head for a stylist.

  • 1 decade ago

    I also have natural hair. I recommend that you get it healthy before doing anything to it. If you'd like to color it, try heat straightening instead of relaxing. Call around some hair salons, esp dominican ones. Many do an excellent job at heat straightening. There are more in California, I noticed but there are definitely some all around.

    I've heard that Carol's Daughter is the best and I will try it once I finish up the products I have. Maybe consider their hair balm to treat your hair.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    you said your hair is prone to breakage, so you might want to use a childrens relaxer just in case. you RELAX it first, then wait AT LEAST 2 weeks to dye it! during the time you wait, make sure to deep condition your hair at least 3 times. if you dont wait, your hair will fall out! happened to me when i was in high school!

  • 1 decade ago

    I have had my hair relaxed for years but during my college years (3) I went all natural. I went to my beautician after graduation and I wanted the exact same thing. She made me get a relaxer first and then I had to wait two weeks to get my highlights. So that is the way to do it. ENJOY!!!!!!!!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Chemically relaxing your hair is EXTREMELY bad for it. Especially if it is prone to breakage. I say dye your hair, and wait a while.. using colour seal/hydrating shampoos, then see if you still want to chemically relax it. Usually a hairstylist will refuse to chemically relax your hair if it will damage it really badly.

    Source(s): I'm in cosmetology.
  • 1 decade ago

    my stylist advises the following:

    get a relaxer first

    get highlights two weeks later (professionally)

    wait 6-8 weeks before your next relaxer

  • 1 decade ago

    If you are going to do this at home the products you buy usually tell you in the instruction sheet what order you should do the procedures. I know that the dying instructions will tell you what to do first. Otherwise, if you are going to have it done professionally - the stylist should be able to advise you.

  • 1 decade ago

    I would go to a hairdresser and ask them. Both can do a lot of damage to the hair if not properly applied.

    Spend the extra money at first and then you can see how they do it and do it yourself at home if you like.

    Good Luck!

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