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Marriage Humor ****

How do most men define marriage?

A very expensive way to get your laundry done free.

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.

Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.

At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" The other replied, "Yes, I am, I married the wrong man."

Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.

A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" And the father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."

Young Son: Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in every country, son.

Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; and then it was too late."

After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." The husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."

A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.

Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.

17 Answers

  • sprite
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago
    Best Answer

    i enjoyed lot... keep posting...

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    The flower vendor was an old hand at unloading his last few bunches. Appealing to a businessman on his way home, the vendor said, "How about a nice bunch of roses to surprise your wife?"

    "Haven't got a wife," responded the businessman gruffly.

    "Then how about some carnations for your girlfriend?" proposed the vendor without missing a beat.

    "Haven't got a girlfriend."

    "You lucky guy!" The vendor broke into a big smile. "Buy both bunches to celebrate!"

    One day, she was alone with her husband, and she was overcome with emotion at his sacrifice.

    She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. There is no way I could ever repay you."

    "My darling," he replied, "think nothing of it. I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek."

  • 1 decade ago


    Good jokes ,i like it dont listen to others they just want to make fun about u nothing else ,it doesnt matter even if u coped it as its bringing smile on so many faces.Any way i dont know why these people think that other person is free to make new jokes ,these type of people just know who to criticise u dont loss heart keep it up ok.

    Take care

  • 1 decade ago

    dear friend, if you're the brain child of this, then u're a super expert. it pierces sweetly the spines of the married man and promises hamper of tale roses to the bachelor. it's a masterpiece, i can't stop copying and pasting on my just opened word doc.

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • 1 decade ago

    Cut and paste is humor-filled, I agree.

  • 1 decade ago

    you make me think twice about marriage

    a star for you lol

  • 1 decade ago

    worth reading middle of hectic office ofcourse

  • 1 decade ago

    AHahahahaha, very funny!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Its all true though... Married life is like that...


    Onli joking... Have a Star...

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago


  • 1 decade ago

    "u can have mine" is good one!!!

    star for u

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