I hate my baby's mama?

I live with the mother of my two children, we were in the process of splitting when she found out she was pregnant with the first one. I did somewhat the right thing and stayed with her, we haven't slept in the same bed since the first was born (2 1/2 years). the second was the product of a drunken night. now I really have feelings of hate towards her for many reasons, but I absolutely LOVE my children and I don't want to not be able to see them for even one day. What Do I Do?

26 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    you sound like me only opposite.. 'I hate my baby's daddy..'

    I am in the exact same situation. I have a 2 yr old. and a new born. ( 2nd was concieved after a drunken night as well)

    We cant stand eachother but are together for the kids.

    The only thing Ive determined throughout this whole thing is that the arguements and fights my husband and I have are very detrimental to our 2 yr old. She is now repeating curse words she hears her father say, and uses it in the right context and everything. She tells him to 'go away' constantly and to 'leave her alone, dam*it' ..

    I think its better for the kids if parents, who cant control their anger and contempt for one another, seperate. You will be a better father to your children the time you do have them and so will the mother of your children.

    As for custody arrangements.. well, joint custody is preferable unless of course she's into drugs or something like that, then the kids should stay with you and she should have visitation/ see them on the weekends.

    So, I dont know.

    Its going to be hard at first but you have to do whats best for your kids in the long run, and seeing their parents fight on a daily basis is not healthy.

    I'm right there with you.. its tough, I know.

  • 1 decade ago

    The right thing to do would be to get out. Be involved in your children's lives, but, anything is better than making them grow up in a house where they will know that mom and dad don't like each other. Let her find a man who will really love her, and do the same for yourself. Just don't keep having kids with everyone who will spread em for you. If you can't use protection, get a dang vasectomy.

  • 4 years ago

    I Hate My Baby Mama

  • unick
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    My Baby Mama

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  • 1 decade ago

    You shouldn't stay because of the children. It's not fair to you or them to be unhappy. Set up some ground rules with the mother. Tell her how you feel and what you would like see what she is willing to do for the happiness of everyone. Chances are she is not happy either. Talk. Then go from there. Children will pick up on the bad feelings from parent to parent.

  • kitty
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    You are not doing her any favors by living there. If you hate her I am sure you aren't very nice to her, and the kids will see and hear it. Thats still your kids mother so you will have to get along. Being in the same house isn't the answer. The courts are more understanding to fathers rights so you will see them. Do what you have to do. It may be easier than you think.

  • 1 decade ago

    try talking to your "baby mama" and try to work this out if it can't be work out maybe separate residences close by will work better for you but you most definitely don't want your children raised in a hostile environment because remember they love you both and they will eventually pick up on the tension between the 2 of you

  • 1 decade ago

    My fiance has a kid with his x also. My advice is that if she wants to be with you, but you don't want to be with her... you better believe that she's going to make your life impossible. Be smart and move on with your life. Your children are going to suffer if the both of you fight all the time and they are caught in the middle. There's going to be some 1 who will love you with 2 kids... as long as your really ready to move on. No going back in forth with the x. BIG NO NO!

  • 1 decade ago

    Don't stay with someone you don't love just for the sake of your children, cause if you are miserable they can feel it and in turn they will feel that way also. I can only imagine how hard it would be to leave my children but then wouldn't you like your time with them to be happy.

  • 1 decade ago

    love them enough to get along with the baby mama. if u can't, get out, because kids will know how you really feel. Love them from another residence. If there's noway to work things out.

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