Should i stay or should i go?

My fiances cousin died of a motorcycle accident and he will be leaving the country to prepare for and attend the funeral. The problem is, he is leaving for 3 weeks and I can't go because I did not get permission from my employer to take any leave because I am a new employee and have only been working there for two weeks.

I really don't feel comfortable with him leaving without me and i dont feel comfortable staying in this house all by myself for that long and I have never been to another country before. Especially a tropical country.

I want to be there to express my condolences as well as experience my first time of travel. I am now faced with the decision of quitting my job to attend the funeral or staying here until he comes back.

The thing is, we were supposed to go on a vacation together in the next several months but since this happened we can't go anymore because the money we saved up for the trip is being used for this unexpected emergency travel.

Secondly, this is his home country he was born and raised in and he has not been there in about 3 years and he has a lot of ex girlfriends who, although I know he is going for a funeral, he may regain contact with them because they will know he is in the country. I want the next time he goes back to his country for us to go there together so everyone knows he is now unavailable.

What should I do? should I quit my job and give my support and right as a wife to be there or should I keep my job and stay? By the way, Incase you may be wondering, It is a nice job, nice people and environment but the pay is not really up to my standard.

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I would inform your employer that there was a death in the family and see if there is any way you can take time off to be there for your husband. Just because he is staying for three weeks doesn't mean you have to. Go with him and stay for the funeral and then fly back the day after. That way you can be supportive of him and still retain your job. I hope this helps. Good luck!

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  • 1 decade ago

    Jobs are very hard to come by these days so I would think long and hard before making any big decisions to quit. You need to think about where the two of you stand financially? Do you contribute the same amount of money to the household as him or less? I would ask him how he feels about you not going. If he needs you to go and gives you the thumbs up for quitting your job then stand by your man.

    I do hope the only reason you want to go is not because of his ex girlfriends but because he needs some emotional support. Right now I'm sure he isn't even thinking about those girls; the guy just had death in the family. If he were to run into them so what, he can tell them himself that he is no longer available. Unless you have insecurities about your relationship.

    Good Luck.

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  • 1 decade ago

    If the main reason you really want to go is because of his exes..then keep your job! I'm sure that he will tell them hes taken. They may be the last thing on his mind now..his cousin just died...I doubt he will be trying to get some "already had" ***. Trust him. If you cant then quit your job and risk him being mad at you for quitting for something like that..It wont look good to any other employers.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Ummm, you mention at the end of your question that you would like to know If you should quit your job and "give your support and right as a wife". You are not his wife.

    Hell no don't quit your job, in this economy. Support him by being level-headed enouph to remain at your job and not stressing out about him hanging out with ex-girls.

    If you don't trust him to go back to his country then don't get married.

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  • 1 decade ago

    sounds more like insecurities. you have to trust him. it's only 3 weeks and if he decides to cheat on you he will do it here. he doesn't have to go very far. it's up to you if you want to quit and go with him but are you going to be okay with no job when you get back?

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  • 1 decade ago

    You have a extream trust issue>Best put the M on hold for a long time>

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  • 1 decade ago

    keep your job, its only a cousin. you have plenty of time. being your first time traveling, you will not have as much fun. keep working and save your money for the right time.

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  • 1 decade ago

    I say give him a little trust and don't quit your job. good jobs are hard to find.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Don't go honey. Don't do it.... it's quite explanitory in your posting. I think your loved ones will understand. Good luck!

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