Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 9 years ago

How do I get her to trust me and open up to me?

There's a new girl at my work, she's been working with me now for almost a year. She's really hyper, fun and happy all the time, but as soon as I ask her something even a little bit personal, like "Do you live with your parents still"? (I do, we're 19) she gets defensive and it's like this huge brick wall just went up. Unless I find a way to change the subject, she's like that for the rest of the shift. She flirts with me though, but won't go out anywhere with me, or even text me. I Googled her name (I know... weird). And a bunch of news articles came up and a memorial website. HER FRIENDS SAY SHE LIKES ME, but to just leave her alone.

1. Teen girl reported missing by social worker, found in mans basement, alive.

2. Who killed Jane Doe (using a fake name)? I read the article, and it was her mom that was killed.

1 Answer

  • 9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Well, there's your answer. She sure has a sh*tty past. She never wants to have to relive that. I have a sh*tty past too (although not as bad as hers) and I never want to relive it either. Two people on the entire earth know about my past.

    You're going to have to give her more than a year. I know a year seems like a good bit of time to get to know someone, but when you've gone through what she has, it's really not. You never know. Keep doing what you're doing, and maybe one day, when there's a lot of people around (although not within earshot) so that she doesn't think you're trying to alienate her, tell her that you're not trying to make her nervous, just that you'd like to get to know her better. I'm still working on opening up to my boyfriend of seven months, not because I don't trust him, but because I've always put up walls, so now, it's hard to break them down!

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