Nothing wrong in accessing his mobile bill and hacking his email(if u have done that), since you found the evidence what you expected. If your wife means the relationship as a "Good friend", no need to hide it from you. Sure it is fishy since she delete the sms and calls. Instead of confronting with her against all these, first think it over from her point of view. If she has fallen for him in a emotional way, there is something missing betwen you and her. That is what that idiot taking advantage of. It is really a most cheap and 3rd rated thing to break a family. The moment he got to know you didnt like it, he should hv moved away and she also should hv left it. If it was a real good frndship, this is what would have happened.
Just forget about that dumb idiot and his threat. He will be behind bars if you give the proof of frequent calls to your wife. Talk to her wife in a calm and cool way. First ask her where you went wrong in making her think of someone else. Tell her that the way she hide things so far tells clearly that something is happening behind. No need to hide or sugar coat anything and you want a open talk to decide what next. Tell her you want to make things work and get back to your happy married life. Tell her to take time and think what she wants to do. Before you talk to her, see her parents with all the evidence and ask them how they expect you to react. Tell them, this is not a complaint against your wife, but your want their guidance as elders and equal to your parents. Never get emotional during the talk and keep cool.
msg me in ym if u wish. Keep cool, everything will be ok
my id frndly13