Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 6 years ago

SexI refuse to date women that expect continual use of condoms in a long term relationship. Is that an unfair condition to?

place on a relationship?

I'm happy to use condoms in the initial stages of a relationship or during casual sex; no problem there. However, sex is a very important part of a relationship for me and I feel that using condoms noticeably cheapens the connection I feel with an SO during sex. To that end, I don't form LTRs with women that aren't on some form of birth control. I would never pressure a woman to go on BC because it's her body and her choice, but I will amicably call off the relationship if she would prefer not to. I do discuss this with a new partner before we have sex for the first time, so it's not like I'm blindsiding them and then flaking out once things get serious; they know my thoughts on the matter before we start anything.

And before it gets brought up: Yes, I would be willing to go on BC if men had any options available to them besides condoms. In fact, I plan on using VasalGel once it has passed clinical trials in a few years, and I would get a vasectomy if it had anything close to a 100% reversal success rate. Unfortunately the success rate is closer to 70-80%, and I'm not willing to play roulette with my ability to have children in the future, especially given that I'm only 22 at the moment.

is it wrong of me to consider it a dealbreaker if a woman is only comfortable using condoms in an LTR, regardless of how compatible we are in other facets? I'd like to reiterate that in no way would I ever pressure or judge women in regards to her birth control

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  • evee
    Lv 4
    6 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    for me of course not...the thing is people should get tested...

    i ran away from a completely fake husband, a sick man that was performing a mission on me and completely tricked me into marrying him and told me he was a virgin...

    we had sex without condoms and gradually i realized he lied about EVERYTHING...

    before i could afford to get tested my husband, my now husband insisted we have condom-less sex...

    i was terrified, i slept with josef fritzl for six months, there was no telling what i could have and pass it on to my new bf...

    you can't really say im afraid i might have hiv, that sounds off putting...and the man would not use a condom...

    to his defense im not sure if they make condoms big enough to accommodate his penis...but i was still properly terrified..

    so don't be like offended if partner wants a test...it's not passing judgment on you, or of a partner wants a condom first few times...maybe they have problems...maybe they discovered they had sex with a high risk person...

    but condoms are temporary, of course it's better to use a pill...pills are very nice these days...they dont make women sick...

    please don't use birth control for men...no...when pills, birth control pills were invented they used to make loads of problems for women...so birth control for men will not be as safe as birth control for women in another 20 years...

    id much rather be on the pill then have my husband take some newly designed male birth control...with loads of side effects...

    i have polysistic ovarian syndrome and for that, remedy is actually taking birth control of the latest series...they are good for my disorder...

    doctors and scientists have been improving the pill greatly, it's a really good product now...

    birth control for men, no, that's like first generations of pills, it's bad for you...

    i don't think any well informed woman would let her partner take male birth control....it's safer is she takes the pill...

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  • Marvin
    Lv 7
    6 years ago

    Just get the vasectomy. For what will you ever need children? They are just vanity men use to "prove their manhood". They are a very bad investment.

    The male pill has side effects that are very dangerous, and worse than the woman's pill.

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  • 6 years ago

    maybe b/c they may be infected with a uncurablevinerial disease and feel its unappropriate that they pass it on. Umm ppl dont just casually fall on they face and say I use condoms cause I have FULL BLOWN AIDS.So they do was convienant by politely asking 2continue2 wear a JIMMY. Geez with civilians running loose n rampant these days....we see withthe statistics r high cause f ppl with simular minds like urs.Think with ur brains and not ur ball$.What wil it take for ppl like u 2 wake up? Maybe catching it n suffering like many of my friends n personal family r r n longer ere 2 tell U what unprotected sex did 2 them.Lifetime of sufferingTaking 100 pills a day in tremendous physical death health the lifelong pain just aint worth 20 minutes of pleasure

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  • Anonymous
    6 years ago

    I am right there with you dude. I absolutely hate condoms. I am older and married and have had a vasectomy so it is not an issue for me any more. But I don't blame you at all. But what would you do if you came across the perfect woman and she flat out refused? That would suck.

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  • 6 years ago

    I would say it would be off putting to me, as some women, like myself, can not take birth control. So, what if you meet one, really fall in love with them, but are not ready for kids yet? Are you going to dump her because she cant take it? Do you know how embaressing it is for a woman to have to state that is her reason for not using it? You may just loose out on the girl of your dreams with that notion in your head.

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  • Sar
    Lv 5
    6 years ago

    Why don't you get your ball cord cut then you don't have to worry do you? Just so you know my realtor was on the shot for 4 years and got pregnant so why is all the pressure on her? I bet even if she was on the pill and got pregnant you would probably blame her for missing a dose or something even if that's not true. Seriously if you are that worried then save some sperm for the future and get your vasectomy.

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  • Anonymous
    6 years ago

    Premature ejaculation was really affecting my life and my relationship with my partner. I went to the doctor who helped me with some drugs. The outcome wasn't completely satisfatory so I decided to test this natural method http://www.goobypls.com/r/rd.asp?gid=565

    I recommend it cause It really helped me a lot. I was able to solve my embarassing problem!

    Cheers ;)

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  • 6 years ago

    If you are getting any...lukewarm responses to the idea, it may be your delivery rather than the idea they dislike.

    It's a tad....clinical.

    Why don't you go with the flow.....after all, if a woman sat you down on the first or second date and laid all her plans for the future, like marriage, then you might hightail it outta there.

    The time for THIS conversation, is when it comes up LATER.

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  • Anonymous
    5 years ago

    The Diagnostic Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM IV) defines premature ejaculation as a persistent or recurrent ejaculation with minimal sexual stimulation before, on or shortly after penetration and before a person wishes. Wow, that’s not a sexy definition. Personally, I define it as you come quicker than you or your partner wants. Luckly this is a great solution for premature ejaculation https://tr.im/770b8

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  • 6 years ago

    So my question is -- are all your relationships based on sex and birth control?

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