Do you believe that you can be married to someone who you feel lukewarm about?

for instance, you're in your 40's clock is ticking and you want to have a family. you meet this guy and he has a good personality but that spark is missing. you don't feel too much chemistry. you're just kind of going wit the motions.

in your head you have a list of exactly what you want that drives you wild but you fear as a 40 year old woman you might never find it and so you settle for a lukewarm romance

13 Answers

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  • 9 months ago
    Favorite Answer

    Of course you CAN marry someone like this. If you’re a single adult you can marry any other single adult you want.

    If your question is whether marriage will magically make things better between you ... no, it won’t.

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  • Athena
    Lv 7
    8 months ago

    Yes.

    Romantic love as the bases of marriage is a relatively new phenomenon. Arranged marriages and mail order brides were the norm for most of history and they worked out pretty well.

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  • Anonymous
    8 months ago

    in your 40's and wanting a family is already too late anyways.

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  • 8 months ago

    I wouldn't want that kind of life..

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  • 9 months ago

    Sure.  Getting married is a legal action.  Lots of people around the world are in marriages with people who they aren't necessarily passionately in love with.  Is it is good idea? That depends.

    Marriage isn't just passionate sex and butterfiles. It is sharing a life, house, finances, health issues, family, child rearing, morals, values, dreams, and goals.  If you can do that with someone with whom you are he'd-over-heals, then more power to you.  Given that more that 50% of all marriages in the U.S. fail, and most of the marriages were based on sexual attraction, maybe being more rational is a better way to go.

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  • Trish
    Lv 5
    9 months ago

    I'm in a similar situation. I have children from previous relationship but no marriage. I want to get married and have more children, almost 55, and my youngest is 29. Most people would say it is too late but I'm still hopeful. I find myself thinking about doing the nonsense thing and marrying the wrong guy instead of finding mr. right. It maybe too late for me but I heard match.com has a lot of success with marriages so I'm still hopeful. You have to decide if you want to compromise...and remember once you're married...

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  • GEEGEE
    Lv 7
    9 months ago

    I would imagine it happens more often than people would suspect. I would be inclined to want something stronger than lukewarm, If, because of age, my biological clock were winding down, I'd perhaps consider parenthood on my own and continue to look for Mr Right going forward.

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  • 9 months ago

    Do you want to spend the next 40 years and bring up children with someone you feel 'lukewarm' about?

    And do you want that person to be with someone who's 'settled' rather than someone who actually wants to be with them?

    If you're in your 40s, the clock has almost run out of ticks... is children the best plan? Are there other options? (sperm donors, adoption etc)

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  • Kelly
    Lv 7
    9 months ago

    No, I'd rather be single than be with the wrong person. You also don't need to be married or even have a partner to become a parent.

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  • Marla
    Lv 7
    9 months ago

    This is reality for most people. If the other person is genuine, responsible, hard-working, and personable, it’s enough for most people.

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  • 9 months ago

    Do I BELIEVE It? It happens frequently, there's no belief about it.

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