Should I tell him I have herpes?

Last year, when I was 19 I had what looked like a “herpes outbreak”. The doctor did a physical exam and sent the swab back to the lab and told me that he’d call back if my result was positive. He gave me herpes medicine called “Valacyclovir” and it went away. However, I did not receive a phone call back so I assumed my result was negative. I was too scared to call and confirm. Since then, I haven’t had any symptoms, but deep down I know it’s herpes. I am dating this new guy who I really like, and it looks like we will be getting serious. Should I tell him about this? 

7 Answers

  • Sam
    Lv 7
    2 weeks ago

    How do you know you didn't get herpes from him.  If you got an outbreak after having sex with him, then you probably got it from him.   Maybe he knows he has it and maybe he doesn't.  

    You probably should tell him but that's up to you.

    You can not spread it unless you have sex during an outbreak when the virus is sluffing off (shedding). 

    It isn't the end of the world, it's treatable, and by telling him, you will find out just how much he cares about you.  Do you want to know if he loves you, then tell him.  If you don't care, then don't tell him but don't have sex with him if you are having an outbreak. 

    FYI:  Both types of the herpes simplex virus can be very unpleasant but they're not dangerous. You can not die from genital herpes or cold sores

  • D_21
    Lv 5
    3 weeks ago

    If you have it then you definitely need to say something before you expose him to it. That should be his choice. Before taking that plunge though, call the doctor's office back and request your medical record. Find out for certain.

    Then ovary up and tell your special person. If they're cool you'll find a way to navigate this together. If not then, that will suck, but ultimately it frees you to find the right person to navigate your journey with you. Someone who loves you with all of your flaws is better than a fair weather friend who can't handle it when sh*t gets tough.

    I know it's scary. It's okay to be scared. Courage is being scared and doing what needs to be done anyway. You're growing everyday. All the days since that test have brought you here. I think you're ready to face your fear of your test result. You're only here to ask for a nudge in the right direction. Only you can know what's right for you. I think you already kinda know. Whatever it is, trust yourself.

  • If you want to be honest, let him know what's going on. Get the results from your doctor. Some doctor's don't like to give out health information over the phone. Some times you have to call them and ask about your results. If they're busy they may forget to call you. Some doctors will prescribe medication as a precaution. That medication is antiviral medication that helps clear up herpes break outs. So either you had herpes or some kind of viral infection. Don't have sex until you can get your results. If your results are positive then you should tell him, before you have sex.

    I've never known some one to kill the person that infected them.

    • Sam
      Lv 7
      2 weeks agoReport

      you have also never known someone to die of herpes. 

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    If you knew you had herpes why would you give it to him.. People can get killed for that stuff. You need to make sure... don’t have sex with him... and find some one with it date someone with herpes...

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  • 4 weeks ago

    Why are you taking an anti-viral drug if you don't know whether you have the virus or not? That makes no sense. Those drugs aren't that great for your liver.

    Call the doctor's office.

    Why would you tell your boyfriend that you have herpes when you don't even know whether you do or not?

    • Sam
      Lv 7
      2 weeks agoReport

      If he prescribed it without seeing it, then the guy is a quack. 

  • 4 weeks ago

    if you know its herpes you should defiantly tell him

  • 4 weeks ago

    You owe him that info so he can decide what to do.

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