It is I, the fecal fairy! I've come to grant you three wishes. What will they be?

Answer 1

My primary one would be to never be constipated again.

Answer 2

Get off the internet, little boi. Your Mummy's coming upstairs with her hairbrush for you bare b**t

Answer 3

Get off the computer and go back to bed. Your mommy is coming to check on you.

Answer 4

1. A nympho FWB who is the dominant one and into bondage. 2. Win the lottery. 3. Live until my 100th birthday with no major medical issues. 

Answer 5

First wish:  An end to retarded anonymous trolls on this site.

Grant that one, and I'll let you know what the other two are.  Hint:  One of them is Beyoncé only without vocal cords.

Answer 6

I want to know will you remember asking this question when you're on your death bed and wanting just an extra 5 minutes before dying? Or will you have completely forgotten all the useless troll things you did?

Answer 7

**** on my face daddy

Answer 8

I want to die.

I want to die.

I want to die.