Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 month ago

Why do aging (30+) women who want to get married and have children take dating so non-nonchalantly?

I have many women friends in their late 20's and early 30's who haven't been on a date in years, make no effort to meet and talk to men they are interested in, and work all the time. But they say they want to have children and get married. Do they realize that if they want another 10 years to find someone, plus the required time it takes to get date (2+ years), get married (from engagement 1+ years), get pregnant (1 year) and give birth (1 year), that they might not be able to? That's like a 5 year investment alone just from the time to meeting a man to having kids with him. If they wait till they are 38-40ish to meet a man, they won't be having kids until 43 at the minimum, most likely 44 or 45, which is then very difficult.

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  • 1 month ago
    Favorite Answer

    Well I guess each person is different. Maybe they've mentally given up on the idea of kids. I think there are plenty that are panicking b/c they are getting older and still have not found the right person and no kids yet. I know if that was me I would be in panic mode for sure.

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  • 1 month ago

    It is difficult. Yet all the rage in Hollywood. Lots of gals are doing it. One way or the other.

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  • David
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    The very worst reason to choose a partner is that you want to get married and have children. Either you will find the right person, or you won't. The fact that you are older and really want to find the right person will not magically make it happen. If you rush into a relationship with anybody, then the odds are near 100% that you just found the WRONG person. When it's right, there are no rules, and no speed limit.

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  • glcang
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Why don’t you ask them ?

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  • 1 month ago

    I agree with you. Maybe the women you're talking to haven't done the math, or maybe they're in denial, or maybe they're just afraid of seeming desperate.

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  • RP
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    That is according to your expectations, as you've defined them, but those friends of yours may have a different time schedule that is much shorter, believing because they are older it will be possible to find the proper partner faster and the whole process will be accelerated.

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  • 1 month ago

    I'm not sure you can speak for all women of that age group, but why are you concerned anyway? Not all women are in a hurry or even want families. i get the feeling you are speaking of one or two women you know and assuming all women want the same things.

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  • Linda
    Lv 6
    1 month ago

    I guess they don't care that much or realize that their biological clock is ticking and they might remain alone. 

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  • 1 month ago

    Seems like you're not clear on the definition of nonchalant, not to mention, how do you calculate that it takes a year to get pregnant, lol, it takes 1 lousy second. 

    I also imagine that yes, the women you describe are acutely aware of the ticking clock, however, the time frame and scenarios you describe are not applicable across the board. Not even clear how their choices are any of your business but I'm sure it's just because you're a "concerned friend".  

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