What is the most mature way to deal with ending a friendship as an adult?

From an early age I have ended toxic friendships and cut off any fake people with no consequences.

At 24, I am surrounded by a handful of amazing, supportive, loyal friends.

However, I am now at a crossroads where I need to end a friendship that isn't healthy. While the friend has been truly sweet an amazing she's dating a manipulative, compulsive liar. We never minded the guy and put up with him but recently we found out he was using his tactics in OUR relationship and his girlfriend (my close friend) thought I was hitting on him. (I've helped her move out twice from this guy and expressed my hatred so not sure where she got the idea 😒) My boyfriend and I said enough is enough and haven't hung out with them in close to two months and hoped they'd take the hint the friendship was over 

However, she's been really persistent and I feel bad because end of the day he turned her into the jealous person she is. But I can't hang out with her because I'm not fake and would not have anything to say. She's back with this guy who is buying her lots of things so she has forgiven his drug abuse and lies...I can't take her seriously when she says he's changed.

Anyways, the other tactic is telling her straight up how we feel. But that will spread to our bigger circle of friends and we like them and don't want to start drama. How do we cut things off quietly with the least confrontation?

I think I'll be fine hanging out in a group with them later but never double date again or just her...

Update:

My boyfriend hates this guy and is fine not associating with him but I don't trust her boyfriend period and am really annoyed he thought just because he lies to my friend he can lie to me and try and tell my boyfriend to lie to me knowing my boyfriend would tell me? This guy is wack. I can't respect or support my friend anymore after I've heard about the physical and emotional abuse he's done that she's forgiven because he paid off her credit card and bought her a house...why is she so blind?!

3 Answers

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  • 2 months ago
    Favorite Answer

    She sounds like a gal who could use a friend. I have female friends who have husbands I don't associate with and who don't like my husband much either. No double dating at all. But every three weeks or so we try to have coffee or a beer together and just talk and laugh about life. Sometimes the most important thing a friend has to offer is distraction and a reminder that chapters come and go.

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      Lv 7
      2 months agoReport

      It's awful. I had a boyfriend once that turned reality around and about and I lost a friend because I believed his lies. I just believed him. Trust gone. 

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  • zeno
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    Keep it simple and just walk away. People

    Follow their own interests and when you

    Are no longer interesting for them they leave

    If they are smart. Sadly I have seen people

    Stick together how are bored out of their

    Mind with each other. Life is short so don't

    Waste time with people you no longer want

    To be with. If you must send them a farewell

    Letter. I enjoyed being with you but I must

    Move on. Take care of yourself and have

    A nice life. Bye bye good luck see you later.

    Far well........

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  • 2 months ago

    What the hell is this retarded sh!t? Mature people don't "talk about the friendship," mature people make time for their friends and they don't make time for people who aren't their friends, you don't sit around discussing it that is so pathetic, seriously grow up

    • But how do I get her to stop talking to me then? I tried your way of not talking/hanging out with her for TWO months. We used to hang out with them twice a week and text constantly. Her boyfriend stopped messaging us but she hasn't.

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