Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFriends · 1 month ago

Who is at fault here?

Rent is due soon, I told everyone In the group chat to send me rent. One person didn't respond for two days, so I reminded him to pay me rent in the morning. He didn't send me the rent all day, so at night time, when I got home, I asked him if he can pay the rent tonight. Venmo takes about 1 to 3 days and it's already Wednesday.

He didn't bother checking the group chat where I always post the screen shot of the utilities, electricity varies each month and sent me the wrong amount. I'm not accusing him that he was trying to pay me less.

My problem is that people don't bother checking the group and I have to remind them or repeat myself over and over.

I told him that he had sent me the wrong amount. After he didn't bother checking the amount, he asked me what is the amount.

I told him to check the chat. Later I told him that please check the group chat form now on. His response was that the group chat is too toxic because of me.

Well, in my defense, he's the one who won't say anything to a roommate who never does the dishes, never throws out the trash and never checks the group chat because he has anxiety.

Since day 1, before we even moved in together into the current apartment, while I did all the work hunting for apartment, keeping everyone posted, I had to repeat myself over and over and over.

I'm fed up because I have to continue to repeat myself because nobody every responds, then I'm told I'm toxic

What the hell is wrong with college kids these days?


There is another roommate who is inconsiderate, thick headed and lacks common sense. He doesn't realize that being loud enough to wake up people in the morning is an act of selfishness or inconsiderate act. He never throws out the trash and people have been complaining to me. He also never does the dishes and I have get upset at him. But I'm the usual one who says anything to him while everyone else is passive. then I get blamed because I'm aggressive.

Update 2:

 I mean, I wouldn't have to be intense if everyone communicated and got involved when things happen. Instead, Im the only one who actually cares about anything, says anything about it. The same kid who tells me that I'm too intense, doesn't have enough common sense to cough into other people's food and says "I'm not sick so that's okay" or leaves other people's room door open because for the sun light. But when asked not to do it, he says "I don't mind if someone else does it to me"

Update 3:

I mean, is it normal to be endlessly patient with them? I'm so fed up with them I can't wait until current academic year is over.

Update 4:

Am I supposed to be forever patient to idiots who leaves their clothes in the washers or dryers and goes to sleep or leave for classes while I also have to wash my clothes? I'm a transfer student and I lived a tough life and worked at tough jobs so I have more discipline.

Update 5:

I see you selfish lazy immature retards sympathizing with a**hole roommates. F you idiots too

6 Answers

  • Edna
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    YOU are at fault!  Why are your expecting your roommates to take the trouble of having to go to your group chat every month to check the amount due you for that month's utilities and electricity? Your roommates' bills are their own private business; they are NOT the business of everyone in a group chat room.


    Your roommates don't HAVE to bother checking the group,  and you DON'T have to remind them to do so.  If you want your roommates' to know the total amount of  their shared expenses with you for the month, then verbally TELL them, and don't post it on social media. 

    • ...Show all comments
    • Edna
      Lv 7
      4 weeks agoReport

      Your landlord might give you the entire bill for the apartment (rent and utilities), but you should NOT post what your roommates owe you for their portion of the utilities on a social media site. Everybody  in that social media group can read it & your roommates' bills are none of their business.

    • Commenter avatarLogin to reply the answers
  • Tj
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    They have this thing, called a phone........use it.

    • Commenter avatarLogin to reply the answers
  • 1 month ago

    Post that stuff on the fridge or the toilet or microwave with pen and parer. you friggin robot. What if dood didnt have a phone or pc? "Read the chat logs" also is not a number. Waste more time instead of cleaning the dishes and whine because someone else didnt do it either, then waste more time posting it on the internet.

    • Commenter avatarLogin to reply the answers
  • 1 month ago

    I've been in your exact same position with two room mates who didn't want to do anything and didn't want to pay anything either.

    You're always going to have problems collecting money, I had this exact problem and any short comings were left to me to pay. The only fair way I could solve this problem was for everyone to either pay a set amount, my case it was £340 a month. Bill usually came up to about £950 and I'd spend the £90 on additional food, washing baskets, dishes... the house essentials basically.

    As for cups and dishes, I bought everyone 1 cup... 2 plates (Small & large)… a bowl and a glass in 3 different colours. I've not really solved the laundry problem but buying washing baskets and keeping them in your room definitely helped with the problem.

    We created a rota to do house chores but no one wanted to buy furniture either so moral was low because we didn't have nice things to look after.

    My advice to you is;

    1) If anyone steals anything from you, expect a replacement depending on price. If they've taken £5 one week, let them off... however if it's £5 every week and it's adding up... let them know and ask if they want to go halves perhaps. 

    2) Collect more money than what is owed, just as long as you refund them at your earliest convenience it shouldn't be a problem, if this isn't an option I'd suggest not paying the bills because otherwise you're responsible for any short comings... and your friends can just get up and leave. If they're annoyed at you for collecting money then perhaps you need to suggest someone else does it or you split the bills in half and another person takes control of one half, this was something I had to do... 

    3) Don't try create order with logic, I assumed that 1 person cooking each night would be a great idea. I can't cook so I ordered a takeaway and paid with my own cash... This annoyed my room mates who would often cook just plain frozen food... despite eating the takeaway we'd have frequent arguments about how I wasn't physically putting in the effort to cook food.

    My math being:

    If I buy 3 takeaways at £7 each that's £21, twice a week so 42 plus that 7 for the remaining day, so it cost me about £49 a week to not cook. 

    7 x 7 is also £49 a week, so I stopped and started to order myself food everyday instead of taking part in their rota. 

    4) Don't do anyone any money favours, I did this... I borrowed someone close to £400 because I had known him 15 years from the age of 6. Few weeks later I caught him moving furniture out of our home, never even told me he was moving out. I gave him an excuse to leave, he was £400 up. Had no regard for us, we had helped him buy his bedroom furniture originally as he only owned a 60 inch TV and a gaming computer. Which he took giving us no time to replace the items, also refusing to pay the last months rent.

    5) Keep your room tidy, just because everyone else isn't cleaning doesn't mean you can't... Clean your room and perhaps pick another room to clean, like the bathroom or kitchen. Then when anyone argues about cleaning, it's not your problem as you have a nice clean bedroom to retreat to.

    • Commenter avatarLogin to reply the answers
  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • Alan H
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Why not just speak to them face to face, and courteously?     It may work wonders

    • Commenter avatarLogin to reply the answers
  • 1 month ago

    Move out or move them out.

    • Commenter avatarLogin to reply the answers
Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.