He told me he finds his female friend attractive?

My boyfriend told me he finds his female friend attractive. I didn’t even ask him. I asked him if they ever dated and he said no because it was long distance. However, now I can’t help but feel like she would have been his first choice had it not been for the geographical issue. When I asked him why he told me he answered “I’m being honest! What, you want me to lie??” This ended in a huge argument in which I almost left. Honestly if this were an isolated insistent it would be one thing but I’m constantly having to tell him things like “I’m not ok with you messaging the girl who used to be your **** buddy.” Or “if a girl Talks to you about her boobs and flashes you she is not my friend and you should avoid hanging out with her.” Idk what to do anymore. I feel like he has the emotional intelligence of an ant. Thoughts? 

36 Answers

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  • 2 months ago

    Dump him...he doesnt value you. You're just his toy

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  • 2 months ago

    My ex would sometimes acknowledge if a woman was attractive. Give it back and tell him about someone who you find good looking. It happens but if  he acts on it then yes it's a problem. I am not sure how old you are... 

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  • This may not be what you want to hear but it is time to move on. He is telling you directly that he is falling out of attraction for you. So do yourself a favor and exit the relationship.

    Don't beg, plead, or breathe down his neck because if you do, you going to bring more heartache to yourself. He is going to cheat on you.

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  • 2 months ago

    And that is why you don't have friends of the opposite sex! It's just temptation!

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  • Helen
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    Mentioning it in passing is one thing (and yes men do notice other women) however there seems to be a pattern of disregard for your feelings. 

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  • 2 months ago

    To be honest, he probably should’ve kept that thought to himself. There was no reason for him to tell you except to make you feel uncomfortable

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  • 2 months ago

    If you want to, you could approach the situation by inquiring more from him about what makes that girl attractive to him and whatever he says ask him what if you were such and such also, would that please him any more or less if you were a little like that other girl.

    Also as one other person mentioned I think, he's probably fantasizing about something so ask and inquire about any kinky or freaky interests that he might have. Foot fetish, BDSM, tickle torture ect ect. If he is into something kinky and it sounds reasonable then get into it with him.

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  • 2 months ago

    Delete lawyer, facebook up.

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  • 2 months ago

    You come across as an insecure teenager, but you are not, are you? Work on your self esteem - there is plenty of help on YouTube, etc. Then find someone else!

    • KARMA2 months agoReport

      To be honest I was really confident as a teenager. It wasn’t until adulthood that I started to feel insecure (right after being cheated on). I was fine at first with this relationship. I had worked on my confidence but all of a sudden I feel back to square one. His comments take me back in a bad way

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  • 2 months ago

    You two are incompatible. Him because he doesn't realize that his comments are insensitive to your insecurities and you because of your insecurities. You asked!

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