Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 1 month ago

How do I stop being bitter, hurt and let go of the past? ?

My boyfriend cheated on me in August. He was texting 3 other girls and FaceTiming one while she was naked and she was posing for him. He didn’t even tell me, we had been arguing for months and I just had this feeling he was up to no good, I looked thorough his phone and I was right. I was upset and hurt and he made a joke and laughed about it then he was I’m not “really” his girlfriend. Then he said he was sorry and had an epiphany and said he wants me in his life forever and that he loves me and will never do anything to hurt me again. But he wasn’t sorry when I was unaware. He cheated right next to me and my family then smiled in our face. I asked him how long would this have kept going on had I not found out he said he would have “eventually” stopped but isn’t sure when. I broke up with him but then I took him back. I love him and he made a mistake this is not who he is. But sometimes I feel so stupid. He cheated on me with 3 girls for at least 4 months. Sometimes I’m okay and other times I want to cry and kick him out of my life. I think he loves me but that’s not how you treat someone you love. I wanna be with him but I’m not sure I can. I worry that he’s cheating every time he goes out with friends or even picks up his phone. I pray and cry to god that he’s stays faithful but I deserve to sleep peacefully at night not worrying about the man I love cheating on me.

I’m not sure what to do, sometimes this is too much and sometimes I’m happy around him. 

Any advice? 

Update:

We were actually best friends since we were 11 years old. We went to the same elementary, middle and high school. We knew each others secrets and were there for each other with family problems and other things. It's one of the reasons I hold on. I don't want to believe that me and the person closest to me fell out this way. I wanted to tell our kids about how we met as kids and fell in love and spent our lives being together. But I don't think our history will keep me here for long anymore.

41 Answers

Relevance
  • 1 month ago

    First off, you are mistaken to call that cheating liar a man. He is an immature boy.

    You are foolish to believe he will change. It is one thing to cheat with one person, but he has a cheating harem of girls. He continually and actively sought out sex from other girls. And rememeber, he said you were not his girlfriend. Believe him.

    He is not worthy of your love. One of these days you will come to your senses and dump him. Until then, you are looking out of rose colored glasses, no doubt about it.

    Hopefully, you will wake up from your dream and realize it is actually a nightmare to stay with him. I just hope you are strong enough to pick up your shattered heart  once again. Because, he WILL cheat on you again.

    I bet you have not been tested for sexual transmitted diseases. Any girls who fall into  bed quickly are loose and have casual sex...high risk for STD's. Your boyfriend is a sleaze bag. How disgusting.

    • Commenter avatarLogin to reply the answers
  • 1 month ago

    I think you should get rid of him. You're right - you deserve to sleep peacefully every night and you deserve to not have to worry every time your boyfriend picks up his phone or goes out with friends. There are so many guys out there, and so many of them aren't like that. You'll find someone perfect for you; someone who treats you right.

    • Commenter avatarLogin to reply the answers
  • 1 month ago

    if he cheats on you while you are his girlfriend, i feel he will be MUCH worse when you are married ....... so give him the flick,in time you will heal  

    • Commenter avatarLogin to reply the answers
  • 1 month ago

    By letting go and say bye, bye to it and not going back, or thinking back looking forward, falling forward, look on Youtube find some never give up, let go of the past videos and start going for your dreams saying I can do it I will win. or as Mr. Les Brown says "It's not over till I Win." 

    • Commenter avatarLogin to reply the answers
  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • 1 month ago

    Why on earth would you degrade yourself by being with such a jerk? Cut him out of your life and be grateful you got rid of such a human cancer. You can escape HIM--but he'll never escape himself--so you'll be the lucky one here. 

    You're right it's too much. He's more misery than the pandemic. 

    • Commenter avatarLogin to reply the answers
  • 1 month ago

    I would try and break up for good, this will always play on your mind. Its only natural and anyone would feel the same. The feelings you have are normal.

    • Commenter avatarLogin to reply the answers
  • Orla C
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Your mistake was to take him back. You've basically given him permission to treat you badly, to lie to you. 

    Ditch him. He doesn't love you, he doesn't respect you. You deserve better. End things with him, be single for a while, and you'll meet someone way better, who doesn't make you feel like you're second rate. 

    • Commenter avatarLogin to reply the answers
  • 1 month ago

    Maybe you have low self esteem or dependency issues- (not crapping on you, just being real)- why would you be around someone who thinks so low of you that he would treat you this way?

    • ...Show all comments
    • irma1 month agoReport

      I actually do have low self esteem. Those 3 girls were so pretty and had similar characteristics and features and I look nothing like them.

    • Commenter avatarLogin to reply the answers
  • 1 month ago

    I really don't think he deserves you im sorry but i don't. You deserve to have peace in your relationship and if you can't get past it then it's better to move on and you shouldn't have to go through that and if he wants to be stupid and wild and not care about the things he does then he needs to be single because the things that he's doing those aren't acceptable in a relationship and you don't need to deal with the back and forth of one day everything feels okay and the next you're falling apart. That sounds draining and you sound very young. If i were you i know it's gonna hurt but if you break up with him at least you can walk away knowing it was never your fault that it ended and it never will be. 

    • Commenter avatarLogin to reply the answers
  • 1 month ago

    he obviously doesn't like you. You should just broke up with him and cut all ties with him. 

    • Commenter avatarLogin to reply the answers
Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.