Is it appropriate?

I learned something not long ago about what my wife is allowing. The father of one of her co-workers is a retied mechanic, & has been 'fixing' certain things on my wife's car..for free. She refers to this guy &his wife as 'friends'. They have her cellphone number too. The wife's co-worker is a 24yr old woman. I find out about 'repairs' after the fact. To be honest, this whole thing makes me very uncomfortable especially when I know the guy has my wife's cellphone number. 

Again, this whole thing makes me uncomfortable knowing a strange man is being permitted to fix the wife's car. Is this appropriate for him to do so? Why so many repairs free of charge? 

Also, the wife took her car to a mechanic about 2 months ago...but her so-called 'friend' didn't know about. it. I'm not jealous...just don't like how this feels. 


If the situation were reversed where a woman I hardly knew was doing things for me, my wife would wonder about it.

Update 2:

She's so-called friends with the co-worker. Hardly knows the co-workers Mother & Father, & it's the father who fixes my wife's car...for free! This guy hardly knows my wife..I find this whole thing very unusual. Why would a man who hardly knows a person fix their car for free, whether they're a "friend of your daughter" or not. He is NOT my wife's friend..

6 Answers

  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    It's probably not some sexual overture if that's your beef. If the coworker is 24 this guy would have to be at least in his late 40's and if he's "retired" he's probably much older. This sounds like you being jealous, which is always gross. But maybe you should arrange to chat with this guy. Tell him you feel bad for all the free work he's done and offer to pay him. Maybe meeting him will put your mind at ease. Chances are he's just bored and loves tinkering on cars. 

  • Dick
    Lv 7
    3 months ago

    I used this ruse several times. Wives of customers, often required "service calls" while hubby was at work. Of course I had to account for my time, and they needed to be able to explain, when the neighbors told the husband that I was there. We always had some "repair" that was needed, and she paid for it.

  • David
    Lv 6
    3 months ago

    You need to set clear boundaries.  She's not allowed to have male friends at all.  It doesn't matter that he's retired and married.  If he's healthy enough to fix cars, then he's healthy enough to have sex, also.  Now, some will say you should cut her some slack as he's much older and married.  But here's the problem.  You have to draw the line somewhere.  You can't make up a silly rule like "No male friends unless they are old and bald" or "No male friends unless they are married".  The problem with such is that they allow wiggle room.  It puts the ball in her court and the penis in her vagina.  Lay down the law.  If she objects, tell her it is her "friend" or her marriage, and MEAN IT.  Follow through. If she raises too much of a fuss, have her served with divorce papers.  

    The time to sort this out would have been before you are married.  But it's not too late.  Just make sure that she is clear on the rules from this point forward.  I don't think she is actually cheating on you.  But she's putting herself in situations where she might be tempted to, and that is a problem.

  • car253
    Lv 7
    3 months ago

    If your wife is going to the mechanic and his wife's home then tell her you would like to go with her to meet them.   You can see what is going on when you meet the mechanic and his wife.    Sounds innocent to me.  But I would like to go to their home and meet with them.

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  • Anonymous
    3 months ago

    Yes, it's appropriate.

    Why are you so insecure, which you are?

    So tell your wife "no more free repairs and I will pay for everything you need."  And then see what she says and does.  Just incidentally, both my friends and my auto mechanic have my cell phone number.

  • Anonymous
    3 months ago

    You are nuts. She will eventually cheat on you and then leave you. Get some help. This is not normal. 

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