Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 4 weeks ago

My wife is always talking about personal things in our marriage to her friends ?

Ok so me and my wife are young, yes we have a social life and I understand that. I let her go out with her friends pretty much whenever. However I’ve caught her multiple times when we were all out with friends, talking to them about extremely personal things in our marriage (particularly our sex life our fantasies etc.). I am a firm believer that some things should simply stay between a husband and wife and I told her this. However this past weekend I caught her again this time while she was intoxicated, talking about our sex life in extreme detail with friends. 

How would you guys handle this situation. I don’t like drama or want pointless fights but it’s getting ridiculous because I’ve asked her to stop. 

18 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    I wish you had given your age.  I assume you're around 21-22?  If so, you're learning one of the reasons why people shouldn't get married young.  She is still very immature for her age.  When I was this age, I was in college, and nobody had to remind me to keep personal details to myself. 

    The other problem you have is bad communication.  There's nothing wrong with asking her to stop, but if this doesn't work, you need to have a more in-depth convo where you make it very clear exactly how this makes you feel.   For example I'm sure it impacts your trust level.  You've only heard what she's said when you're around.  What has she said when you aren't?  It's also pretty dismissive if she knows this bothers you and doesn't care.

    If that doesn't work, I don't know what to tell you.  This is not a minor issue.

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    This is tough. Some people are over sharers. You've expressed that you don't appreciate this and she did it anyway, which isn't okay. I will say though as someone who can't shut up once I get a drink in me, it may be the alcohol talking and not necessarily a respect/disrespect thing. If she drinks often, you may need to talk to one of her close friends and ask them to kind of keep tabs on her a little. To either cut her off or steer the subject of the conversation if it starts to get too personal. That or talk to your wife about it and ask her to relay that message to her friends (friends who hopefully take their alcohol better than her). Just really drive home to her how much it bothers you and while you appreciate her trying, she needs to step up and do better. If she is naturally an over sharer it may take gentle reminders now and then until she gets used to it. She has a right to enjoy time spent with friends just as you have a right to your privacy. Best of luck.

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    When young couples get together they enjoy talking about their sex life .This is a common thing . Avoid taking it seriously so long she does not give them the impression that her sex life is not that interesting .If that is the case the matter should be discussed with her with a view to arrive at a solution.

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    You need to get a divorce.

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  • 4 weeks ago

    I did the same to my ex. And he didn't like it. BUT I DIDN'T KNOW and felt bad when I realised! TELL HER!  You can only complain if she keeps doing it after you have told her.

  • 4 weeks ago

    It would all depend on whether she was complaining or bragging about it. The best thing you can do is stop going out and spend that time practicing sexual things.

  • 4 weeks ago

    Ask her if gossip with her friends is more important to her than honoring her husband and her marriage. Flat out ask her. Why is YOUR request of less importance to her than gossiping about you to her friends? ASK HER. That's a slightly different question than asking her to stop sharing what you believe is private but it's very attached. My guess is that she has the habit. Habits can be hard to break. But if you change your request into a very directed question.. might break through her joyful independence to realize she's actively damaging her marriage. She needs expand her conversational abilities. 

  • 4 weeks ago

    Just let her talk as she like it.

    Do not worry about dstails of your sex life bc every body do sexual intercourse. 

  • 4 weeks ago

    How very kind of you to "let her go out with her friends pretty much whenever". However, you need to remind her that what happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom. Women are far more open with each other about personal things than men, but they tend to keep things within their group on the whole. 

    b

    You may not be able to change this, especially if she feels a need to get drunk. Keep trying, but I wouldn't make it into a war if I were you.

    Good Luck!

  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    If you were keeping her happy between the sheets and she was bragging about your performance, I doubt you'd be posting, so you know what to do? 

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