Anonymous asked in Society & CultureEtiquette · 4 weeks ago

Was I rude for not saying thank you ?

Last school year, before COVID shut our school down, my math teacher helped me pass his class. Our school is semesterized, so courses ended in January for the term. I was at a 55 overall and needed a 60 to pass the course. On the last day of the term, my teacher allowed me to redo assignments so I could get my grade up to 60, so I ultimately passed. 

Mom says my teacher was very kind in allowing me to redo work I didn't hand in and asked if I thanked him. When I told her I did not, she said I was "shamefully rude" and made me email him to say thank you. But isn't helping students pass the teacher's job? 

Was I really "shamefully rude" for not saying thank you? 

6 Answers

  • 3 weeks ago

    I don't know about "shamefully", but yes: you were rude. The teacher went out of his way to help you, which he wasn't at all obliged to do. You should certainly have thanked him, first on the day he let you re-do the exam, and again when you "ultimately passed".

    Don't ever take the attitude that "Well it was just his job" or "I'm sure he isn't expecting a thank-you from me". It's precisely when we DON'T expect a thank-you, and one comes, that we really, really appreciate it.

    Don't be ungracious. He did you a favour: you owe him thanks.

  • Jerry
    Lv 7
    3 weeks ago

    Would your teaching have been in trouble for NOT allowing you to redo those assignments? No. So your teacher was NOT "just doing the job," but was giving you special attention.

    What is up with this resistance to saying "thank you" to a teacher who helped you? Why would you be reluctant to thank a teacher who helped you? 

    Life lesson: People enjoy doing nice things, helpful things, for those who APPRECIATE it. Don't show your appreciation and those people are lot less likely to do nice things for you, be helpful toward you. 

  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    i dont think so, he was just doing his job

  • 4 weeks ago

    A teachers job is to give the same help to all students to help them pass, not give those who don't carefully do the class work or don't bother doing it in the first place another chance to do so.  Doing so also creates more work not normally required of the teacher too.  

    You should have said thank you.  As far as being shameful, that is your mother's perspective because you are a reflection of her and apparently your poor manners are shameful to her.

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  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    Your teacher went above and beyond and did not have to do that. He or she did unnecessary extra work to help you out.

    Teaching students is a job. Helping students is dedication, genuinely caring, and giving up time from his or her personal life to help you to pass. Also, you waited until the last minute rather than addressing your difficulty at the beginning of the semester. I don't know whether I would have been so gracious.

  • 4 weeks ago

    If you don't thank someone for doing you a favor, what's the likelihood that they'll ever do you another favor if you need one? Slim to none. If another teacher asks this teacher whether they think you deserve any favors, how likely do you think this teacher will say "yes"? Highly unlikely.

    Apart from the fact that it's just civil to thank someone for doing something for you, once you get a reputation for not being grateful for favors people do for you, the less likely it is that anyone's ever going to do you another favor.

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