English speakers, could you help me?

I am not a native speaker of English and I need to write a paragraph about a biography of an employee. Do you think I should change something to make it sound better? 

During her school years she excelled in writing and had a dream of pursuing journalism. She began writing articles for the local press at a tender age of 15.She admitted that the the royalties she received during that time felt like really good money to her as a teenager.However, her plans were thwarted by a coincidence: after accompanying her sister to a job interview at Raja Ferry company, she ended up getting the job herself and now she has entered a second decade since she joined the ferry kitchen as a head chef.

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  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    During her school years, she excelled in writing and had a dream of pursuing journalism. She began writing articles for the local press at the tender age of 15.She admitted that the the royalties she received during that time felt like really good money to her as a teenager. However, her plans were thwarted by a coincidence: after accompanying her sister to a job interview at Raja Ferry company, she ended up getting the job herself,  and now she has entered a second decade since she joined the ferry kitchen as a head chef.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    "...at the tender age of 15."

    I would avoid the word 'thwarted' since it implies something going wrong. I also think that 'coincidence' is wrong.

    "However, her plans changed due to an unexpected event: ....."

    Note that I am British.  I know that Indians have different ideas from us about uses of the English language.

  • A.J.
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    See if you like this better:

    During her school years she excelled in writing and had a dream of pursuing journalism. She began writing articles for the local press when only 15 years old.  The compensation she received for the work felt like really good money for a teenager.  It fit both her desire to write and a monetary reward for doing what she enjoyed.  However, her plans were diverted by a fluke event. In accompanying her sister to a job interview at Raja Ferry company, she ended up getting the job herself and she has entered her second decade since she joined the ferry kitchen, now as a head chef.  

    Look up in a dictionary any words I used that you do not know, and also words I changed from yours.

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