Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Society & CultureEtiquette · 4 weeks ago

if you speak your truth, and someone says 'it isn't the truth' - how should you react?

there have been times i spoke my truth and someone said 'that isn't the truth', and i got annoyed.....and i asked them to prove that what i said was 'lies', and they couldn't do it.

but how should you react when someone does that?

Update:

g - excellent advice i thought, many thanks, very helpful.

8 Answers

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  • g
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago
    Favorite Answer

    You need to find acceptance that your truth isnt universal. Others do and will have differences of opinion and see things very differently. Thats not personal and you need to step away from everything being a personal affront. Also, everything doesn't require a response.

  • 4 weeks ago

    For over 50 years my  response has been to such idiots that they have a right to their opinion, no matter how wrong it might be.

  • 4 weeks ago

    If someone says "That isn't the truth" it does NOT mean they think you're lying. They mean it may be YOUR truth (whatever that means) but that they see things differently.

    Please please work harder at not taking EVERYTHING so personally and aggressively.

  • 4 weeks ago

    Well, stop saying that is my advice. I think if you just say what you have to say, and not label it something cringe like "my truth" then people won't automatically be in an adversarial mood about it. Presentation affects things a lot.

    When someone says something about truth people expect it to be something that's universally verifiable, that everyone can accept. Nowadays, people have cringingly started to use phrases like "my truth" that changes its meaning, but honestly most people seem to not like that. They get put off. If you just stopped the advertisement that it's some variety of truth and just said what you have to say, then people would probably not contradict you as much. Maybe try it out. I think when someone says "my truth" they are trying to put up a barrier in what they are about to say, that you can't question this. I will question it, even if quietly and find it a "tactic" more than a person just talking to me like a regular person. You don't need tactics like that in everyday conversation, people generally don't like being subjected to what feels like an unnecessary defense wall being thrown up. That's my feeling anyway.

    Edit: I just remembered how this phrase is often used and it answers your question better. People often use this when they are about to say something controversial. It's like they think saying it's "their" truth will prevent any effort to dig deeper into it, and that's annoying. Example, someone was saying once that "university of wisconsin is racist" (it wasn't any more specific than that). Now, I went there, and people are extremely nice, "so nice that visitors think you're screwing with them". University of Wisconsin Madison is not "racist." That person who was saying that was a person of color who I assume says stuff like that a lot without people pushing back, hearing things like this in a university campus is literally an everyday event. But, when you say something stupid like a university at large is racist or even suggest its people are who are the nicest people around. That's stupid. I don't care if you say it's "your truth", it's not "the" truth and that's what people push back on. Because what you're doing is a scheme, it's an attempt to prevent discussion, and to enter a claim into a discussion without it going through the fair process every other idea goes through which is subject to scrutiny. That doesn't sit right with people. Your experiences are your experiences, but it's when people try to go beyond their own specific situation and try to enter thier personal experience as evidence for something larger. That's not appropriate, and people don't tolerate it because it's weasley. If you have a point, then make it and defend it. 

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  • Anonymous
    4 weeks ago

    It depends on what you mean by "if you speak your truth."  

  • Native
    Lv 5
    4 weeks ago

    I ask them to prove it.

  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    4 weeks ago

    I find that as long as I qualify "my truth" by admitting it's just my opinion and not objective fact few challenge me on it. Stating up front that what you're about to say is merely anecdotal will draw less ire. 

  • 4 weeks ago

    I don't go around opening my yappy trap to people who don't want to hear it.

    If I did, I wouldn't be surprised when told to STFU.  I'd do it instead of playing butthurt.

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