Anonymous

Am I a bad Mother?

My adult daughter confided to me about wanting plastic surgery and asked that I pick her up after the procedure to which I refused. I am against it since I think she should be proud with what god gave her and can spend her money on more important things. My daughter has since then told me that she feels betrayed but made it clear she will not hold this against me. 

I don't feel bad for not going with her but I want to know if I made the right decision? I am hoping she will change her mind since she has no one else to be there for her. Am I being evil for letting her go alone?

Update:

She can call an uber or a cab.

6 Answers

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  • 4 weeks ago
    Favorite Answer

    You child is no long your little girl.  She is an adult woman who thinks she knows what she wants.  All of us have some issue about ourselves that we would like to change & now days it is a very common thing to do.  You have to allow her to make her own mistakes & suffer from them, she needs these life lessons.  Now whether or not you like the idea is not up for debate.  It is her choice & if it is wrong she will pay for it.  But she has to make mistakes on her own & learn from them.

    You don't want to drive her away by not being there for her when she needs you.  She trusted you up until now.  Don't violate her trust, she may never confide in you again.

  • 4 weeks ago

    She asked for your help and you refuse to give it. It's nice that she won't hold it against you, yet you're the one that's holding something against her. 

  • T J
    Lv 6
    4 weeks ago

    If your daughter is smart, she will get a cab, and forget you are even alive, and cut you out of her life forever.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    A bad mother? Maybe, but you're an even worse troll. I'd say "nice try", but it wasn't really.

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  • 1 month ago

    Well number one she can’t go alone. Depending on the procedure she can not be under any sort of anesthesia and then drive afterward. The surgeon would never ever allow that. 

      I’m 23 and got plastic surgery about a year ago and it is something I don’t regret, I just barley think about it and honestly it didn’t make me any more confident. Newsflash as f*ck, I’m still insecure! Haha. 

     My husband was the same way you are, he didn’t want me getting plastic surgery and was super against it but he did drive me there and drive me home and he actually was super supportive with ice packs and stuff even though he didn’t agree with my decision. 

     The thing is sometimes most of us girls just have to learn the hard way. I was very set on getting plastic surgery and nobody and nothing was going to change my mind including my husband. 

     However if you daughter is thinking about getting breast implants (like I did) I would truly truly tell her to weigh out the pro’s and cons. Not only can you get capsular contracture, which is essentially your body’s response to a foreign object, which results in extreme pain, loss of sensation, and immediate removal of your implants, you also have to keep in mind that breast implants have to be replaced every 10 years. It’s not a one and done kind of thing. 

     So really have her look into the procedure she’s getting and research, research, research! 

     Also the pain after plastic surgery is BRUTAL. She better be planning on taking a minimum of two weeks off of work because when I tell you I COULD NOT MOVE, I mean that. God, it was the worst flipping pain, sharp shooting nerve like pain. Make sure she’s prepared for that because whatever procedure she’s getting done she’s going to NEED somebody there for her. It’s not really an option. 

    I don’t know my husband really disagreed with my decision and my procedure but at the end of the day he said “I love you for the person you are not your body or the way you look and if this makes you Truly happy then, it is what it is” 

      But honestly I don’t even think they will allow her to get a procedure done unless it’s lip injections or something minor.. without a designated driver. 

    Also she might have to learn the hard way like I did, but plastic surgery truly doesn’t make you any less insecure.. it doesn’t fix all your problems, it honestly just makes you feel like you need more work done. ITSSS ALL A LIE. Girl to girl. 

  • Embery
    Lv 5
    1 month ago

    She can call a cab, you are the worst.

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