Adam asked in HealthMental Health · 1 month ago

what is your relationship with your neighbours?

do you know their name?

their jobs?

etc

how is a normal neighbour relationship like?

i want to know for personal reasons. im highly antisocial and have trouble and anxiety interracting with neighbours. 

im locked in and fear going out. im afraid of these people.

i dont know them. i dont want to know them. 

i dont want them to know me.

i feel like they could search my trash an bin to get my name info from postal papers etc.

i have 4 cams filming at the moment 2 of which capture footage 24/7 but i jave no time to monitor everything they do.

i fear for my safety.

how can i make it clear i want absolutely nothing with anyone from my neighbourhood?

14 Answers

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  • 4 weeks ago

    I get along fine with my neighbors, we all look out for each other. The only issue I have with my next door neighbor, is that he is a slob and always leaves things half done. The little old black lady across the street has a Biden / Harris sign in her yard, and I can certainly live without that. But we all get along well. I'm sorry to hear that you are so untrusting of your neighbors. If they're really that bad, perhaps you should move to where you feel more comfortable. You should be able to count on your neighbors, and they should be able to count on you. Good luck !

  • 4 weeks ago

    dont want any thing to do with my neighbors and yes they seem to be ok

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    What's caused this to happen?  Have you been assaulted by your actual neighbours or are your fears all in your head?  Did something happen in your past that you're afraid will repeat?

    You need to get your anxiety under control.  If something happened where you presently live then moving for a fresh start would be a good idea.  If these particular neighbours have never done anything you gear then moving won't help at all.Do I know my neighbours?  Yes, most of them.  Some I am genuinely friends with, others I'm well-disposed towards but have no strong feelings either way, a few I dislike, and one has a very bad vibe that scares me.  I'm pleasant to ALL of them.  

    Those small words that people exchange about nothing much when their paths cross are actually really important.  They don't mean that we're friends and have to hang out together but it does mean that we've broken the ice which makes it easier to go knock on a door when there is a problem, like a common sewer blocking up or a tree falling into the road which we can pool our resources to clear immediately instead of waiting a week for the council to do something which benefits all of us.  

    Making the effort to make community makes me feel safer overall. It's important to realise that personal boundaries are like concentric rings.  You have to give some to get some, but letting someone into one tier does NOT mean you have to open up all the tiers.  That's a recipe for disaster, but so is letting no one into the outer tiers.  If you don't let people into the tier where you exchange meaningless pleasantries you can't realistically assess them and I suspect that this is a reason for your anxiety. 

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    there are only 2 house on my side of the street (on my block) mine and the other house, we always talk when we see each other. there is 5 houses on the other side of the street ans 3 out of the 5 houses are accusing me 23 years old woman and the new neighbor that lives beside probably about 60 years old (a man) of sleeping together why I do not know! They said since we talk that means we are sleeping together, when I act completely normal around him! And that is dumb as they talk to other neighbors too! it is just my house and his sites far back into the woods, and theirs are about 6 steps away from the road!

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  • 1 month ago

    I poke his wife when he is at work.

  • garry
    Lv 5
    1 month ago

    its good she calls me over often , to stay when her hubbies on night shift , pure patonic thing .

  • Andy C
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    6 neighbors adjoin with my property and I know almost every one and am friends with multiple. 

    I was kind of blind and in a wheelchair when we moved in and I didn't experience the initial 'meet and greet.'  It took years to build good relationships but it is SO worth it. 

    My neighbors took care of my mom during a month long snow storm that she was watching our house and dog while we were in NZ.

    We have a few that just want their privacy and we are happy to accommodate them and they, us.

  • Tavy
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Shame. 

    Here in Cornwall we all have helped each other in lockdown. Shopping done, prescriptions  collected, swapped plants from our garden, shared apples from our trees. Got a lift when our car broke down.You must live in a horrible area.Very sad.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    my neighbour across the way from me is a nice lady in her late 40s, very private, respectable and keeps herself to herself, that's how i conduct myself too.

  • James
    Lv 4
    1 month ago

    My last remaining neighbor is a very friendly older woman who will try to talk to me and my family all the time but I'm not very social and typically Dodge her to avoid conversation. When we do get in a conversation it goes on for a long time but we just talk about life and catch up. Its hard sometimes to have these conversations but I'm always glad to in the end because it's good to get to know someone close to you in case you need help one day or can help them someday. A stranger came up to my house today on a bike and saw me and biked away real fast so I'm thinking of going over to my neighbors house to tell her to be on the lookout and make sure nobody steals anything from her house or mine. Its good to know your neighbors for situations like this

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