Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 2 months ago

What should I do? ?

So my best friend and I decided it would be a good idea to engage in sexual intercourse. 

This has been going on for a year. 

I have now developed romantic feelings. I love this man with my whole heart. 

I confessed to him, I love him. 

He rejected me. It hurts. Says he wants me as friend. 

He wants me to still be friends although the last few times we've hangout, its been painful and awkward for me.  

I hold back my tears and breakdown on my rides home. Every text he sends I am crushed when its not telling me he lives me too. 

He knows how I feel buts refuses to stop our contact. Says he cares about me too. 

How can make him understand my pain right now? 

Why wont he let me go? 

Update:

He got really angry when I said no to friends - I felt his reaction was quite selfish. 

I said if you don't love me, then let me go. 

He said it was hard for him too. But I mean, he rejected me for someone else anyway so I can't understand why it'd be hard for him, unless he was just planning to use me as a backup. I know he has every right to reject me, but I have every right to do what I need to do to be happy as well. We surpassed friends when we started having sex, that HE initiated. 

2 Answers

Relevance
  • 2 months ago
    Favorite Answer

    He won't let go because he gets the best of everything. He enjoys the sex, he likes your companionship, but he doesn't have the responsibility of a relationship to deal with. You're the one who will have to let go. Stop seeing him, stop texting, stop having sex. If he can't understand your pain when you say "I'm in so much pain when I see you, because I love you and you don't love me, because I want a committed relationship but you don't," then there's not much else you can do. 

  • ?
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    One of the problems of having sex is that it invites concepts of ownership.  He doesn't want to be owned.  So he has to reject overtures that appear to want possession.  Of course he won't say "I love you".  That would be tantamount to surrender.

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.