How can I teach my dog to bark with a posh accent?

Question

Update:

He is a brave little Jack Russell, and he dutifully barks at peasants when I am telling them to get off my land, but he sounds too yappy and has a naturally friendly face. People just laugh at him and want to pet him.

PS : He is good at growling and biting.

Update 2:

Thanks everyone for some funny answers. 

@Jack - I pinned back his ears. It worked, He barked in Polish.

Answer 1

Favorite Answer

Pin his ears back together with a cloths pin. Works every time! Oh, wait. I thought you meant 'Polish'. Sorry!

Answer 2

They USUALLY come WITH a "POOCH" accent.......😂😂😂😂

Answer 3

Have the best of Dame Celia Molestrangler and Binkie Huckaback playing on a loop in his kennel.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=kc2YLzzGx9k

Source(s): Round The Horne

Answer 4

Stop teaching it to say 'sausages'.  Get it to say 'Chorizo' or 'Bratwurst'.

Answer 5

Sounds imposhable..🧐

Answer 6

First, you need to bark yourself in a posh accent, the dog will pick up on that. 

Answer 7

Get a Mastiff upper lip and all that rot.

Answer 8

Put a plumb in his mouth 😉 

Answer 9

Send him to The Posh Language School for dogs at Oxford 

Answer 10

Mission Impossible....