People keep asking when I’m having a baby?
I just got married 3 months ago and am ONLY 24. Yet everyone keeps saying oh I bet you’re pregnant, or why don’t you just have baby now? When are you having a baby? I want kids I THINK but not anytime soon. Am I wrong for reacting negatively to this? People keep saying I get too defensive about it but it’s my body and from what I’ve heard pregnancy and birth isn’t exactly easy. What’s a good response to this?
- Common SenseLv 72 months ago
First off, being pregnant and childbirth is a piece of cake compared to actually being a good parent, by the way.
Yeah, it is annoying to be constantly poked about when you will be raising a family. But, understand this, just like a marriage proposal leads to an engagement and an engagement leads to a wedding, the marriage typically leads to pregnancy. So, naturally, people will ask about a baby next. Just like when you got engaged, people asked "when are you getting married?".
I was in the same position as you are and I came up with a pre rehearsed answer..."it will happen when it happens; at which time I will let you know".
I hesitated to answer that question with a timeline because if it happened sooner than later or later than that, it still left the question to be asked or assumptions to be made if I got pregnant sooner than answered. Keep it vague, but not open for additional questioning.
- 2 months ago
I didn’t get this but I am now. Like I had my son and people ask me now when I’m going to have another and it bothers me to tell people I don’t want another! Not to mention we are positive I can’t have anymore due to a birth injury with the first!
maybe there infering about you weight , think about it ..after all are you large , another word for obese .
I had this from the moment I got married, and I was only 21. If I'd got married at 18 (As a lot of my contemporaries did) people would have reacted the same way, and assumed I 'had' to get married. Some thought that any way. It took a few years before I started them to mind their own business. Then if you dare to make the decision to stop at one child you get told it's your duty to provide the child with a playmate, One woman put it 'your child shouldn't be alone when you are both dead,' She did not like it when I pointed out that one of her children is likely to be the last one left and there's no guarantee they will die at the same time, so as not to be alone.
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- Christin KLv 72 months ago
:You look them in the eye and tell these rude people "We'll have kids when WE are ready. End of discussion." Then you either walk away or change the subject, or BOTH. Don't even entertain going further. Shut down the discussion with one sentence and refuse to talk about it any further. People who think they know what is good for others often don't respond to a kind or subtle way of telling them to stop. You have to be somewhat blunt and unemotional about it. But don't talk with them if they continue to press you!
- Anonymous2 months ago
You're below the median child bearing age (30sh) fyi zjqp
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- ?Lv 72 months ago
Pregnancy and birth don't have to be difficult!
Try not to concern yourself about what other people might think. Most of them are probably not really being very serious, and I expect that they are friends who care about you. So make light of it with some little quips such as, "when I'm sixty four" (a Ringo Starr song). Maybe that's a bit old, but try to think of a little quip of your own that isn't defensive or aggressive. They mean well and are taking a genuine interest in you. Alternatively, just be yourself and say that you are not ready yet, or that you won't be thinking about it for at least (two?) years! Good Luck
- LizLv 62 months ago
I always replied with you’ll be the first to know if something changes.
- edwardLv 72 months ago
You’re not quite ready to have kids. That’s fine. I got married and we started having kids right away. She wants a big family, that’s fine we have a big house. But yeah, we were only dating for a year before getting married and everyone was asking when we were going to get married...that was before we were engaged. It can get tiresome but telling people that you’re not ready is like telling someone you don’t want a credit card...over and over again
- Anonymous2 months ago
Congratulations! 3 months, 24, wow! You must be on top of the world!! So when are you having a baby?